Not Intent on Arriving

Life List: Be Asked to Read My Poetry in Front of an Audience

2012-01-27T09:09:00.000-05:00

So, I've been lucky enough to actually complete this goal not once, but twice. And, I'll be doing it again this weekend! (And a few other times throughout the next few months, so stay tuned, and check my portfolio for updates in a new section: Readings.) If you're around NYC on Sunday, I'd love to see you. Below, you'll find some information, and to RSVP, click here.

NYU Poetry Night at Lungfull’s Zinc Reading Series
Sunday January 29th - 5:30pm (doors open at 5)

Readers: Matt Broadus, Gino Figlio, Peter Longofono, Kristin Maffei, David McLoghlin, and Cat Richardson

Curated by the Lungfull! Magazine Rapid Editorial Action Go-Force: Anahit Gulian, Brendan Lorber, Edmund Berrigan, Kristin Maffei, Mariana Ruiz, Mike Smith, Molly Dorozenski, Tracey McTague, working together to hasten the collapse of Western Civilization & to fill the new void with an age of perfect days & better nights.

www.lungfull.org/zinc

Zinc is 82 West 3rd Street (btw Thompson & Sullivan) NYC

Readings are $5, or best offer which goes to the readers so they can buy you a drink afterwards

Copies of Lungfull! magazine will also be on-site. Buy them all and burn them outside the bar as a warning to all would-be poets & publishers.

Lungfull! is made possible in part by a generous grant from the New York State Council on the Arts.

This announcement has been optimized to be ignored on all platforms and devices but then intuitively understood in such a way that you arrive at the reading without ever having been consciously aware that it was about to happen.

Two Year Blogiversary

2012-01-25T05:49:00.000-05:00

I can hardly believe it's been two years since I first started this blog. My cousin and I were sharing an incredible trip to Iceland, and I decided it was finally time to create a blog to record my travels. My life was different then. I was 23, in a job I couldn't stand, and not coping well. Roger was five hours away, I was bored out of my mind, and I felt like I was wasting all my potential (not to mention the tuition money spent on Sarah Lawrence). Starting this as a place to record all the amazing places I'd been gave me a tiny bit of hope that I'd be in amazing places again. And I was. Iceland was amazing, and 2010 slowly started a sea change for me. Two years later, I'm in a job I genuinely enjoy, finally realizing my dreams of going to grad school, and living in a place I love with a person who feels like home.

And I'm so glad I've been able to share it with everyone who stops by my little corner - some of the most supportive people I know. To show some of my gratitude, I'm going to repeat last year's giveaway:

Anyone who comments on this entry will be entitled to one homemade postcard, delivered wherever you are!

If there's a chance I don't know your address, comment and then email me it. And thanks for another great year, guys. Here's looking forward to many more!

Gratitudesday: Friends

2012-01-24T23:58:00.002-05:00

I spent most of today in a sour mood. When I wasn't frantically trying to finish a book for class tomorrow, I was re-numbering the art in one of our manuscripts for the third time. I try not to compare myself to others, because I really believe we're all on our own journey, but today, it felt like everyone I knew was doing something more amazing than me.

Here's a brief sampling of people I know were doing today:

getting published in the New Yorker
buying houses
being teachers
booking fabulous trips to far-off lands
getting married
seeing the Aurora Borealis in my hometown*

And while I was sitting there, making sure that the numbering of 234 images was consistent between six separate documents (that's checking that I used a dash instead of a period, and that I've labeled it as "photo" and not "figure" a total of 1,404 times), I was having a really impossible time not feeling jealous. I was really happy for everyone, but I was also disappointed that nothing even vaguely exciting was happening in my life. It was not my most attractive moment.

But, when I came home, I used my food processor to slice cabbage, and it worked really well. Then, Roger discovered the ice cream I'd hidden in the freezer for him, and was way more excited than I was expecting. And then, I finally finished the book, and when I moved on to find a poem for workshop tomorrow, I realized I've actually written much more than I'd thought this month. And being out of my headspace for just a few hours has made me realize that even without anything enormous and interesting coming up, I'm still having a pretty great time, and a big part of that is being surrounded by the incredible people who surround me. I don't think my life would be half so interesting if it weren't for all these people doing such fascinating things, and I'm grateful to have them in my life, reminding me of how many new things there are left to try.

*Okay, I'm still jealous of this one. But, Angela informs me that it should keep going throughout the next few weeks, so hopefully I'll manage to get up there during one. Because I have wanted to see the northern lights since I was in second grade, and our trip to Iceland in January, prime northern lights time, didn't yield very good results, due to heavy cloud cover.

{This Moment}

2012-01-20T05:47:00.000-05:00

{This Moment}

A Friday ritual inspired by Amanda Soule & many others.

Please feel free to share a link to your own moment in the comments.

Cooking with Kristin: Chicken Pot Pie

2012-01-19T06:42:00.001-05:00

And tonight, yet another meat dish - chicken pot pie! An amusing story about chicken pot pie: while I was in England, one of my closest friends there ate a lot of frozen chicken pot pies. We made fun of him pretty mercilessly, and eventually he started making real food, but never really lost the reputation. Until a few months ago, when he became one of the hardest-core vegetarians I know. One might say "fundamentalist vegetarian." I don't think he'd approve of this recipe, but I have to say, it's seriously a lot better than frozen. And, I think you could really easily substitute potatoes for the chicken, and not miss out on much, so keep that in mind, vegetarians.

Two quick notes: Having a food processor (pretty sure this is the model I have) made making pie crust about a thousand times easier than having a fork. If you can get your hands on one, I think it would be a great investment. I can't wait to make peanut butter in mine! Also, the gravy that this makes is really, really good. If you're vegetarian, I would highly recommend it. It tastes as rich as any meat gravy I've ever had. I could definitely see this tasting great and just a little different on mashed potatoes.

Photo Credit: Roger.

Pie Crust
(Adapted from How to Cook Everything, Mark Bittman)
Makes enough crust for a top and bottom pie crust, plus enough for one bottom. I think I could have used the original recipe and had enough for the top and bottom, but I wasn't sure, so I doubled it. We'll have dumplings tomorrow! Also, this is really decadent crust. I think you could easily use 3/4 or 1/3 of the butter and be perfectly satisfied.

2 1/2 cups all-purpose flour, plus more for rolling
1 teaspoon salt
2 sticks frozen or cold unsalted butter, cut into chunks
5 tablespoons ice water, plus more if necessary
1 egg

Combine the flour, salt, and sugar in the container of a food processor and pulse once or twice. Add the butter all at once; process until the mixture is uniform, about 10 seconds (do not over-process). Add the egg and process another few seconds.
Put the mixture in a bowl and add 5 tablespoons ice water; mix with your hands until you can form the dough into a ball, adding another tablespoon or 2 of ice water if necessary (if you overdo it and the mixture becomes sodden, add a little more flour). Form into a ball, wrap in plastic, and freeze for 10 minutes or refrigerate for at least 30 minutes).
Sprinkle your baking board with flour and put the dough on it; sprinkle the top with a little flour. Use a rolling pin to roll with light pressure, from the center out. If the dough is sticky, add a little flour (if it continues to become sticky, and it’s taking you more than a few minutes to roll it out, refrigerate or freeze again). Roll, adding flour and rotating and turning the dough as needed; use ragged edges of dough to repair any tears, adding a drop of water while you press the patch into place.
Place the bottom crust into the pie-pan and place in freezer for 30 minutes or refrigerator for an hour. Leave the top flat on the baking board while you prepare the filling.

Chicken Pot Pie Filling
(Adapted from Allrecipes)
There was a little extra gravy left over from this, which we'll use with the extra dough we have leftover, but you may want to tweak the proportions a little bit there. Also, as I said before, this would probably taste just as good with potatoes in place of the chicken, so feel free to experiment with that, also. Finally, the original recipe called for celery and celery seed. I'm sure that would be delicious, but we didn't have either on hand, and the flavors were complex enough without it.

1/2 pound skinless, boneless chicken breast halves - cubed
1 cup sliced carrots
1 cup frozen green peas
1/4 cup butter
1/3 cup chopped onion
1/3 cup all-purpose flour
1/2 teaspoon salt
1/4 teaspoon black pepper
1 3/4 cups white wine
2/3 cup milk

Preheat oven to 425°F.
For chicken mixture: In a saucepan, combine chicken, carrots, and peas. Add water to cover and boil for 15 minutes. Remove from heat, drain and set aside.
For gravy: In the saucepan over medium heat, cook onions in butter until soft and translucent. Stir in flour, salt, and pepper. Slowly stir in white wine and milk. Simmer over medium-low heat until thick. Remove from heat and set aside.
Place the chicken mixture in bottom pie crust. Pour gravy over. Cover with top crust, seal edges, and cut away excess dough. Make several small slits in the top to allow steam to escape.
Bake in the preheated oven for 30 to 35 minutes, or until pastry is golden brown and filling is bubbly. Cool for 10 minutes before serving.

Cooking with Kristin: Chili

2012-01-18T06:20:00.000-05:00

I read a lot of food blogs, going out to fancy meals is one of my great pleasures in life, and if I can giave myself lots of time to make pretty simple recipes, I am generally a happy girl. I'm not the world's greatest chef and I hate to do dishes, but I do sometimes have some successes. The past few meals I've made have turned out, if I do say so myself, pretty wonderfully, so I've decided to share them with you this week.

They also involve cooking meat, which is something I've basically never done before. I was more or less a pescatarian for several years, and I've never been too fond of raw meat, so this was an adventure for me, and I turned out to enjoy it much more than I thought I would. In general, I try not to eat too much meat, and to eat local, sustainable meat whenever possible, and the best way to do that for me tends to be to cook vegetarian meals. But, I'm trying to be braver in the kitchen and in life, so this past week, I experimented and made some meaty meals.

This first one, I See Stars Chili, is a Maffei Family favorite. My mother somehow obtained the recipe* and promptly handed it to my grandmother, who cooked my family's meals when I was growing up.** We assumed my grandmother memorized the recipe and tossed it in the trash, because after she passed away, we couldn't find it anywhere in her kitchen, and we considered it a great culinary loss, not unlike her beef-barley soup and dumpling soup.*** Luckily, my grandmother must have had some foresight, and one day, while we were looking for another recipe, we discovered I See Stars hidden away in my mother's little recipe box, safe and sound.

Being the technologically savvy family we are, we promptly scanned it in, and today, I'm sharing it with you. It's spicy, warm, and hearty, and it goes equally well over fresh cornbread or buttery rice. Enjoy!

*Totally unclear who she got it from. Or who Anneleis Venus was. Perhaps this woman?
**This was while I was a vegetarian. I asked my grandmother to make a vegetarian version, and she happily obliged. But when I found a piece of bacon in it and asked her about it, she said, "well, you need some meat to keep everything together!" Grandma didn't really understand vegetarianism so well.
**My mother still claims that her grandmother really made the best dumpling soup, but that recipe is also lost.

Worlds of Wonder: New York, New York

2012-01-17T07:23:00.001-05:00

You know that I live in New York.* If the sarcasm and feeling like I live at the center of the world didn't tip you off, probably the longing photo of the Hudson River as my header and the fact that I go to NYU did. Did you know, though, that I have basically never lived anywhere else?

I try to be more globally oriented. I <3 google maps. And also traveling.

It's true. Sure, there were those nine or so months living in Oxford, and another two months right afterward living in Middlebury. But, for the vast majority of my 25 (almost 26, oh my!) years on this blue planet, I've lived in New York, and the longest I've ever spent outside of this place was six months, from January - June 2007, when I was wandering in and out of England.

I used to worry about this business of never leaving the place I was born, and when I applied for college, and for grad school, and for teaching programs, and for grad school again, I mostly applied to places that weren't in New York. And somehow, I ended up right where I always was, and somehow, it has always fit really well.

We have problems, New York and I. Especially the city part. I don't like the smell of urine, I don't like being afraid to take the elevators at the library, and I don't like feeling rushed. I do still worry about what I'm missing when I'm so firmly planted in one state. And, yeah, I'm worried about whether we'll be able to afford to stay here, and if I'll ever find a teaching job here. But, I love seeing the Empire State Building out my office window. I love trips upstate for wine and camping and long drives. And I especially love feeling a part of a network, a community, and being so close to all the people I've loved for so long. Basically, it feels like home, and I love feeling at home.

*I live in Manhattan right now, but when I say I live in New York, that I identify as a New Yorker, it isn't necessarily because I live in Manhattan (although I do feel less douchey about saying it now). When I say New York, I usually mean the state. If I mean Manhattan, I say "the city," which I can acknowledge is pretty annoying for people who listen to me in any other major city. I spent my first five years in the Bronx and the next thirteen in Putnam County before making the enormous, 40 minute move to Lower Westchester for college. I haven't ever lived upstate, but I've spent enough weekends in Albany, Greene County, and the Finger Lakes to make me feel like I've got some sense of things there, too.

Home Sweet Home

2012-01-16T21:27:00.001-05:00

Oh man, guys. Remember that time I said I'd post our pictures of our decorated apartment "next week"? Well, three and a half months later, your wait is over! Below, please find pictures of our apartment. Roger still didn't want me to take and post them, but his pleas of "Just wait until we get our ampersand!" and "We haven't vacuumed!" fell on deaf ears. So, if you do comment (which you should, because now I can respond!), please be kind and don't mention it if you see any dust. And, keep in mind that we're still waiting on a wall-hanging and one last bookshelf.

Welcome to 2B!

When you first walk in, you face the living room, and the dining area is to your right.

The living room window, my favorite print, and some of our plants.

In all likelihood, the ampersand will go to the right of the hanging lamp.

Our hand-me-down coffee table, a pot from Roger's museum, our rug, my retro candy dish.

Roger's bookshelf, and his "flair"

My bookshelf and my "flair." (Roger made the sculpture.)

Another view of my bookshelf, and our family photos.

Our fancy diplomas and fancy blinds.

End table with vintage lamp and awesome coasters. They say "Time & Tide Wait for No Man."

Roger, as I am writing this, says, "Why are you promoting our apartment?" Cutie!

Our dining room. Painting by James Secor. Like most of our art.

I think this image captures our home really well.

Extra counter- and cabinet-space!

Our fridge, with a pretty accurate caricature of us.

Roger put these shelves up with his BARE HANDS. And a screwdriver.

Cookbooks! (Not featured: The American Girl Doll Cookbook. A classic.)

The greatest dishes known to mankind.

Where the magic happens. All the cooking magic.

Look, I just saved you the trouble of walking down the very long hallway!

More art, this time from Kristin Palladino.

Just a quick right to the bathroom!

AKA: the only room that has been fully finished since we moved here.

Yay neutrals!

The bedroom! Big closet! Green walls!

A DESK!!!

My solid-wood furniture. AKA: Hard to move.

Possibly my favorite part of our whole house.

Yep.

A funny story: In 2009, I was paid out for 4 vacation days. They just barely paid for this quilt.

LL Bean & gummy vitamins 4life!

And, there you have it, folks. Thanks for sticking with me through this whole process, and for being so patient while I got these all posted!

More Virginia!

2012-01-14T06:55:00.000-05:00

Just in case you didn't get enough of our new cat last week, my good friend and photographer-extraordinaire, Erica, posted even more about her on the world's premier cat blog, Well-Tailored Suit. Thanks for making the trip out to Harlem not once, but twice, Erica, and for doing such a great job capturing Virginia Woolf!

http://welltailoredsuit.wordpress.com/2012/01/11/one-time-i-finally-made-it-to-harlem/

{This Moment}

2012-01-13T06:42:00.000-05:00

{This Moment}

A Friday ritual inspired by Amanda Soule & many others.

Please feel free to share a link to your own moment in the comments.

Meet Virginia

2012-01-05T21:49:00.001-05:00

Welcome, 2012! And, welcome, Virginia Woolf,* our new cat!

We adopted her on Monday, and have since spent most of our time at home cuddling with her. She's a five-year-old domestic shorthair, and she is the cuddliest cat I've ever met. She likes to play with her mice, but is afraid of balls with bells in them, along with most other loud noises. She's also more vocal than any other cat I know, but in a generally sweet way. We love her to bits, even if I did have a brief moment of panic after seeing just how much she loves to be near us.

We were deciding between Virginia Woolf and a slightly calmer, very beautiful, Russian blue with FIV, and since VDub has spent most nights sleeping on either my or Roger's pillow, yes, I worried I'd gotten ourselves into more commitment than we could really handle.** But, just a few days in, she's chilled out a lot, and we love her to bits.

So, now we have a little personal assistant. So far, Virginia Woolf has helped me read, cook dinner, and, oh yes, sleep. And I couldn't be happier to have her around.

*Yep, my idea. She was a part of my Christmas gift from Roger, so I feel okay about hijacking her naming rights. We were deciding between Virginia Woolf and Mrs Dalloway, but VDub just seems to fit better. She's serious and vocal and a non-traditional beauty and once Roger's mother said that "Virginia" sounded too much like "Vagina" I was sold. 100%.
**Commitmentphobic might be a New York stereotype, but people - 15 years? That's a long time! We are now reconsidering whether we want to ever have children. My friend Sarah has pointed out, though, that "you can send kids to camp."

Trip Flashback: Washington, DC 2009

2011-12-31T09:01:00.002-05:00

Being in DC this week reminded me that I've never posted about the little road trip Roger and I took there in 2009. I can honestly say that I don't remember what we did on Day 3, but that I do distinctly remember searching endlessly for good food after I wrote this, and that we ended up going back to the hotel exhausted, and ordering Dominos online. It was actually a pretty fantastic meal.

August 15-16, 2009 - Washington, DC

Roger and I are having a lovely time in Washington. We came so that Roger could do a little research for his honors thesis, at the Museum of African Art, and to do a little sightseeing. Other than a quick overnight visit with my friend Vrinda last March, I haven't been here since I was 12, and Roger's never been, so we're enjoying our time exploring.

Yesterday, our Megabus was a little late (when isn't it?), and we arrived in DC at 2:30pm or so, and headed to our hotel, Rouge, which is hypertrendy, and a little trashy. The trendy part: everything is bright red and they have free hangover brunch of bloody marys and cold pizza every weekend morning. The trashy part: there's a huge mirror overlooking the bed and everything is bright red. Still, it's close enough to everything (about a mile away from the White House and monuments), and was pretty cheap. We grabbed a late lunch at Old Ebbitt Grill. The restaurant is from 1856 (the oldest bar in DC) and has gorgeous green velvet booths and gas lamps. It's pretty touristy, so even though it looks fancy (and there was a wedding going on when we came), they're fine with coming in in shorts and the prices are nothing more than you'd find anywhere else. After, we walked around the monuments, and Roger catered to my desire to have a picture of us in front of the Monument. That night, we went to a Thai restaurant with Vrinda, followed by walking around DuPont Circle area and visiting Kramerbooks and Afterwords Cafe, which had fantastic books, including Handmade Home, and a very cool ampersand decor. We finished up the night by getting fantastic ice cream at Larry's, which was really good (almost as good as Blue Marble, and with more flavors), but had a bizarre mural based on "Guernica" with ice cream.

Today, we had bloody marys and cold pizza, and headed out to the National Museum of African Art, by way of HSBC (we'd found a stray credit card on the street yesterday, and returned it there this morning). Roger had been planning to do part of his thesis on the permanent collection there, but after we arrived, it turned out that just about none of the permanent collection is on display, which was pretty upsetting. They had a really lovely ceramic water bottle, but not too much else. I liked a lot of the art in the exhibits, but there were some really big problems with their presentation. We then wandered around in the heat, before deciding to get lunch at the National Museum of the American Indian, which was pretty good, and divided up by region. After that, we headed over to the National Museum of American History, where we saw the First Ladies' gowns, Julia Childs's kitchen, and some presidential memorabilia. Completely exhausted after seven hours of walking and visiting museums, we headed back to the hotel, and are now enjoying the air conditioning, because it's hot outside!

Roger wants me to note that we're having a debate about whether we should go out or get pizza with garlic butter dipping sauce delivered to the hotel. We're really not, though. We're definitely going out in a little while. Overall, though, we like DC. The city is spread out, so it's been a lot of walking, but the city is very lovely with all its white marble, and the museums are mostly free, which is fantastic. We're still not sure what we'll do this evening or tomorrow, so we're open for suggestions.

Business Time: Day 2 - DC

2011-12-28T23:35:00.000-05:00

It turns out that business trips are mostly that - business. Despite my best efforts to wake up before I needed to and spend two hours luxuriously getting dressed and eating breakfast while reading the paper, I woke up about a half hour before I needed to get downstairs and then went down early to help finish with set-up. The rest of the day was spent being a bookseller at a conference - taking down requests for exam copies, explaining some of the highlights of our books, generally talking to professors about the classes they're teaching - which, it turns out, is quite different from either presenting at a conference or attending one. This conference is much bigger than any of the others I've been to, and it's been fascinating to see all the interviewing, book-proposing and general networking that goes on at it. It's really making me consider going to the AWP next year.

After hours, I met up with Sarah, who was wonderful enough to come out and meet me for dinner on short-notice. We ate at Mai Thai, which was really delicious, and spent about two hours talking which was, frankly, exactly what I needed today. It was wonderful.

Business Time: NY to DC

2011-12-27T20:44:00.000-05:00

I consider myself to be reasonably well-traveled, but one thing I've never done is travel alone. Sure, I've flown by myself a few times, navigated with a map on my lonesome, and I've been in charge of my own passport for as long as I've had one (ten years this spring!). But I've never spent a night alone in a hotel room. Never not had someone with whom to eat dinner. Never gone to a place I didn't know well without another person to back me up.

Until now.

I'm in DC for a big conference right now, and this was always supposed to be my first business trip, so that on its own would have been interesting enough for me (now I can write about what to pack when you travel for business!). But, Roger was originally supposed to come down with me. There are several art exhibits closing in the next few weeks that he wanted to see, so the plan was for him to spend the days meandering around the city, and for us to share evenings and a fancy hotel together. Unfortunately, his grandmother passed away last week, and the funeral arrangements meant that he couldn't come any longer. So, I'm flying solo for the first time ever.

Penn Station & Trip Reading

Thus far, it's been fine. I'm trying to take this opportunity to get to know myself a little better, but, as it turns out, I know myself pretty well, and also, I have a lot of work to get done, so that's interrupting my self-discovery a bit. The train ride (my first Amtrak ride ever - I am in love) was uneventful, and I spent a good amount of time gazing out the window. The presence of technology (in the form of my smartphone) makes it much more difficult to really unwind, and to get reading/writing done. I'll keep that in mind when planning our next trip. Once work was over for the day, I was faced with my first awkward-alone task: dinner. I decided on a Lebanese restaurant that was really good, and ordered take out to eat in the room. On the king size bed I have all to myself. Then I crawled into a hot bath, and now I'm posting this before reading some more. Mostly, it's what I would be doing if I was alone at home, except that everything has a small air of difference. It's nice and relaxing and strange.

Traditions: Gifts

2011-12-22T19:57:00.000-05:00

I think presents are a pretty big part of Christmas traditions for everyone, but certainly one worth noting. My Christmases have always been filled with gifts. They flow from under the tree like two giant waves: my gifts on the left side of the tree, my sister's on the right, and we used to open them wearing matching pajamas. One particularly precocious year, perhaps my sister's first, my mother asked me on video camera what I thought of Santa. "I think Santa has the same wrapping paper we do!"

My parents, who are wonderful at all times of year, really shine at Christmas. My father's crazy lights, my mother's amazing cooking, and their dual ability to know what we want and get it, even when we give them lists at the very last minute, and even when our gifts previously involved "every single toy in the JC Penny's catalogue." Of course, the pile of gifts under the tree has grown smaller as we grow larger, but it's still more than any two daughters could ever deserve - to say nothing of the year my mother hid iPods in the stockings, usually opened after my parents have opened their gifts, and generally filled with candy, soaps, and little trinkets. We've been spoiled Christmas after Christmas, and I could not be more grateful for all the happy memories that it has created for us.

I also really love buying Christmas presents. It's been a bit of a trial the past few years, with less spending money than I'm used to, but I try to find something thoughtful whenever I can. I can't spill any of the details here, in case a gift-receiver is reading this, but I hope everyone enjoys what I've given them, and I hope it's all a surprise.

Also, this year, I received a wonderful gift from a twitter gift exchange. I love the little community that has built up around twitter and this blog, and I could not be happier to have received this wonderful little bundle from Meghan. She sent a winter care-package, filled with wonderful things to keep me warm: tights, tea, and the prettiest yarn you can imagine. It was the perfect package, filled with things I really need, and I was so glad to open it during a hectic day at work (and at the prodding of a friendly co-worker - the other thing about me and gifts is that I love to savor them, and so it takes me forever to open them.) Thanks so much, Meghan - it's all perfect!

Traditions: Feast of the Seven Fishes

2011-12-21T22:42:00.000-05:00

http://www.flickr.com/photos/49698777@N02/5289972947

So, this tradition appears to have an actual basis in one of my "old countries," Italy. The feast of the seven fishes is thought to have originated in southern Italy, and since my grandmother's family was from Calabria, and my grandfather's family was from Naples, it makes sense that this is something that was carried over with them. Anyway, I think it was. I haven't actually asked either of my parents if this was something they made at home.

My other grandparents were off-the-boat Irish and one-generation-off-the-boat-"German," so I have no idea what my mother ate on her Christmases as a child, but she's the one who makes our seven fishes now. Our Christmas Eve dinners are probably the greatest meal we eat all year, and my mother, who does everything in her power not to cook most days, whips it together like it's no big thang. She's a champ, and I really think she could hold her own with the best Italian grandmothers out there.

In case you aren't Italian American (ahem, Shelby!), the basic premise is that you can't eat meat. I have no idea where this comes from - Christmas Eve isn't a fasting day like Fridays in Lent* - and the truth is, we don't actually follow it. Our appetizers include lots of hard sausages along with fresh mozzarella, olives, and roasted red peppers. But, the rest of the meal is meat-free and filled with seven different types of fish, one to represent each of the seven seas. One day, I'll post some recipes, but for now, here's our list of what types of fish we usually make:

Clam dip, served with fresh bread during appetizers
Lobster tails
Crab legs
Stuffed flounder
Shrimp scampi
Coconut shrimp
A "grab-bag" fish, where my mother experiments with new recipes. In the past, this has included baccala, trout and salmon, and this year, we're trying sea bass.

It's also the one time each year that we use the leaves in the dining room table, and set it with the Christmas china and fancy silver. Even though we open most of our gifts on Christmas morning, Christmas Eve has always felt like the most special part of the holiday to me, and this meal is the main reason why. Every year, it's the same,** even as the people around the table change, it always feels like home.

What special meals do you cook for the holidays?

*My parents and I share the same lack of religion, but growing up, we followed Lent under the watchful eye of my grandmother. It actually wasn't such a big deal - Fridays were pizza day in our house anyway, and even now, I prefer eating vegetarian anyway. Hearing coworkers at my last job complain every Friday about not knowing what to eat for lunch except tuna-fish sandwiches and pizza basically made me want to slap them.
**Unlike Christmas Day meals, which seem to be forever in flux. We've had lasagnas, turkeys, and hams, and while dinner on Christmas Eve starts at a civilized 7pm, dinner on Christmas Day is more like Thanksgiving and begins around 2pm, when you still haven't recovered from your food-hangover. This year, I'm gunning for a light brunch. We'll see how it goes.

Traditions: Weihnachtsgurke

2011-12-20T16:49:00.000-05:00

I have long wished for a Weihnachtsgurke. Like many Americans, I was taken in by the myth that German children search the tree for it on Christmas, and the first to find it is awarded a special present. I can't remember when exactly I decided I wanted one, but I'm pretty sure it was before I turned 12. Our Christmas traditions have been a pretty hearty mix of Italian-American and Baby-Boomer, so it seemed like a nice way to bring in my German heritage. Alas, they always cost about $50. (I was, apparently, always finding the Christopher Radko ones.)

Imagine my excitement when, on a spontaneous shopping trip a few weekends ago, I discovered an affordable one at Sur La Table, on sale for just under $5. Of course, I immediately bought it and added it onto the tree, totally ignoring the tradition of hanging it up on Christmas Eve and letting one lucky child find it first the next morning and get an extra gift. Because, well, there are no lucky children around here, and it seemed silly to have Roger find it on the tree.

And, of course, immediately after that, I googled "Weihnachtsgurke," because, naturally, I wanted to share my findings with you folk. Turns out that the tradition really isn't one at all. Which might seem disappointing, but I also recently learned that my German heritage probably isn't German either - it's more likely Austrian or Czechoslovakian. So, it seems all these heritages and traditions are a bit arbitrary (and, need I say, commercial) anyway, and I can make the pickle my own tradition if I want. And I do, and I will.

And, the rest of these days leading up to Christmas, I'll be writing a little bit about my family's holiday traditions, the ones that have gone on for more than the past three weeks. Not to give anything away, but my parents are pretty big on Christmas.

Weekend Wanderings: December

2011-12-19T20:34:00.000-05:00

Oh my, it's actually only been 10 days since my last post, but it feels like ages. A lot of little pleasures have been had, many of which were recorded with my camera phone.* I will proceed to tell the story of December-so-far with them now.

12/03: Inspirational Emily Dickinson lecture at Poets House.

12/04: Painted the bedroom in Ryegrass. Lovely.

12/10: Friends and the Kings County Distillery

12/11: Becky and Shaelyn and an afternoon of shopping for holiday presents.

12/15: Earshot reading (my first ever reading where my work was selected by strangers!)

12/17: Holiday shopping, HIMYM, dancing until 3am at Beauty Bar.

12/18: Ducks and a cat in the park on the way home from getting a delicious brunch of bagels.

12/19: Corbis sends us their annual holiday thank you gift - posters!

*I tried to find a quick way to round the edges on these to make them look better, but it didn't easily work for me, and let's be honest - this post is overdue enough. If anyone has suggestions on how to make me a little more hipster (other than getting instagram), let me know and I'll do my best.

Peppermint Bark

2011-12-09T10:03:00.000-05:00

I made peppermint bark for the first time yesterday at around 11:30pm. It was incredibly easy to do, and since it's one of my favorite candies, I'm pretty glad to have made it on my own. I used Paula Deen's recipe and followed it pretty closely, except that I also sprinkled a little bit of the mints on the top for a festive look. If I ever get more time, I might try Orangette's recipe, but for now, this one works just perfectly. If you're looking for a quick make for your cookie exchange, secret Santa, or holiday party, I'd definitely recommend this.

Peppermint Bark

Crushed candy canes, to yield 1 cup
2 pounds white chocolate
Peppermint flavorings, optional

Place candy canes in a plastic bag and hammer into 1/4-inch chunks or smaller. Melt the chocolate in a double boiler. Combine candy cane chunks with chocolate (add peppermint flavoring at this point if desired.) Pour mixture onto a cookie sheet layered with parchment or waxed paper and place in the refrigerator for 45 minutes or until firm. Remove from cookie sheet and break into pieces (like peanut brittle.)

December Already?

2011-12-05T22:23:00.002-05:00

Oh my. It seems just when I think I'm caught up, things start all over again. I can cook or take out the trash or do the laundry. I can finish my schoolwork or keep on top of my work-work or paint our bedroom. And for enjoyment, I can blog or knit or read or decorate for the holidays. I'm always sad I can't do all four, but last weekend decorate I did:

I really love the idea of creating an advent calendar tradition, where each evening is a different activity (most of these have cute ideas), but I sort of realized that even though this is our first Christmas living together, it really isn't the right time for us to start such an intensive tradition. Instead, we've been making up smaller traditions as we go along: popcorn while we made our Christmas cards (and listening to Sufjan Stevens as I filled them out); talking about all the places we've been while putting on the ornaments; lots of television and schoolwork in our pajamas.

Before the holiday itself, I'm hoping to add just a few more: making peppermint bark, visiting Rockefeller Center with my parents, and watching at least one holiday-themed movie. There's time, in years to come, for knitting and baking and popcorn chains and paper crowns and good-luck drunkard's brunch on New Year's Day.

{This Moment}

2011-11-25T06:02:00.000-05:00

{This Moment}

A Friday ritual inspired by Amanda Soule & many others.

Please feel free to share a link to your own moment in the comments.

Happy Thanksgiving 2011!

2011-11-24T12:05:00.001-05:00

Best wishes to all of you for a wonderful Thanksgiving Day of gratitude, warmth, and love!

source: NYPL Vintage Holiday Postcard Collection

I've been so thankful for the ways in which my life has changed in the past year: for being in school; for our new apartment and all the moments I've spent with Roger in it; for movement in my career; for my parents and their incredible relationship (they're celebrating 32 years of marriage today) and, as always, for my family and friends and the myriad ways they support and love me everyday. Thanks also to everyone who is reading this today - I've so enjoyed being a part of your community.

A Big To Do

2011-11-22T16:52:00.000-05:00

Isn't it amazing how things always take longer than you expect? I took this week off to catch up: to comment on the month's worth of poems that I haven't written on yet, to edit the semester's worth of poems that I've written and received feedback on, to update this blog and Call & Response, to send out a ton of submissions, to organize my papers, and to celebrate Thanksgiving with my family. So far, it hasn't gone so well. I can say honestly that despite having five straight days in a row off, I haven't actually accomplished a single one of those goals. Cue loud, sad sigh.

I have gotten a few things I set out to do done: running a little, taking a master class on the sonnet, sitting in on a Comp & Lit class for observation, sleeping enough, cooking a bit, visiting Shelby for a bridesmaids weekend, seeing lots of James and Emily who are visiting from upstate, keeping almost up-to-date with my work email, updating my amazon wish lists for the holidays, discovering a mouse that lives in our apartment, and, perhaps most impressive, actually getting almost back on track with C&R (seriously, check out the link. We even have new work up!).

But, you know. Almost none of those things were what I'd set aside all this time for, and I'm feeling a little guilty about it. I'm going to push through tonight and tomorrow morning to see what I can get done. Make some lists. Try not to worry too much about what isn't done yet (holiday cards, Shelby's bridal shower plans, the syllabus I'm supposed to edit), and focus on the important things (as listed above) instead.

What's on your to-do list this week?

http://www.flickr.com/photos/95954918@N00/3437630552

{This Moment}

2011-11-19T00:14:00.002-05:00

A weekly ritual inspired by Amanda Soule. Please feel free to leave a link to your moment in the comments.

Weekend Wanderings: Homeward Bound

2011-11-15T20:47:00.000-05:00

A good weekend, with too much running around: Friday, after post-work drinks with some of my favorite ladies, I headed down to the Emerging Writers Series at KGB Bar. It was the first time I've been there for that series, and it was a really great experience. All the readers were phenomenal, and of course now I'm terrified for when I'm reading there next month (December 2nd, if anyone is interested in coming). I know, though, that everyone will be supportive. I'm so grateful to have found such a kind, supportive community in what I know can be a competitive field. Everyone from NYU has been so great.

Saturday, I headed back upstate for Liz's 50th birthday party, meeting up with my mother for a little shopping and lunch at the new complex at Ridge Hill. The mall is nice, and fits my Westchester aesthetic (LL Bean, Sur La Table, and Whole Foods? Yes, please.), but parking there is an absolute nightmare. I went for a run, and realized I actually really, really prefer running at home to running in the city, even if Central Park is wonderful. After watching the marathon last weekend, I'd like to be able to run it myself in 2013, so I'm back on the running bandwagon, in between the poetry bandwagoning and the work bandwagoning. And, of course, Liz's party was wonderful. Liz has been my mother's closest friend since a few months before I was born, and so I've grown up really idolizing her. The friends and family that come to her parties feel like my friends and family, and so it was really great to catch up with them.

And on Sunday, I went for half a hike with Cece and her boyfriend, Justin. I say half a hike because we never actually made it to our destination. Apparently we could have parked at the halfway mark, and gone up from there, but we didn't. When we did reach the parking lot, though, we (okay, Justin and I) were so demoralized, we couldn't go the rest of the way. While we didn't quite get the scenic views we were hoping for, I had a great time, and felt incredibly sore the next day. The soreness is how I judge a good day. And now we have plans to do the second half over Thanksgiving weekend.

You'll notice I didn't do much work this weekend, and also that I've been blogging at the fantastic rate of about 1 entry a week. Ahem. Yeah. About that. I have a lot to catch up on. I've been doing some writing (not, unfortunately, at the rate of one poem a day in honor of Nanowrimo, but some), and I'm glad to be getting more out onto the page. But, as a result, my editing (both my work and my classmates') has fallen completely by the wayside. Luckily, I've given myself my first ever staycation for next week, and I've got big, big plans to get some work done. Poem-writing, poem-revision, poem-commenting, poem-reading, in addition to getting caught up on C&R, visiting Shelby for a bridesmaid weekend, taking a master class on the sonnet, writing up some syllabi for my teaching seminar, sending our our three-month-old moving announcements, sleeping late, replying to about a million emails, and celebrating Thanksgiving: I cannot wait!

Life List: Memorize & Internalize 10 Poems

2011-11-10T07:01:00.000-05:00

I've always liked memorizing poems, and since memorizing 10 is on my life list, I figured I'd bring us on a guided tour through the ones I've already memorized, and how they've treated me through the years.

A Childish Prank from Crow (Ted Hughes)

Man's and woman's bodies lay without souls,
Dully gaping, foolishly staring, inert
On the flowers of Eden.
God pondered.

The problem was so great, it dragged him asleep.

Crow laughed.
He bit the Worm, God's only son,
Into two writhing halves.

He stuffed into man the tail half
With the wounded end hanging out.

He stuffed the head half headfirst into woman
And it crept in deeper and up
To peer out through her eyes
Calling it's tail-half to join up quickly, quickly
Because O it was painful.

Man awoke being dragged across the grass.
Woman awoke to see him coming.
Neither knew what had happened.

God went on sleeping.

Crow went on laughing.

Crow is, in my opinion, one of the greatest books of poetry ever written. It was the first thematic book I'd read that didn't feel trite (as themed chapbooks sometimes do), and so it made me feel that almost anything was possible (including, perhaps, a little book of astronaut history poems). Crow was also one of my first introductions to really, really good creation of a new mythology. It's something I went on to continue to study, the intersection between classical works and modern re-tellings, but Crow is still one of the most creative pieces I've read. "A Childish Prank" is one of my favorite pieces from the book because I love creation-myths, and I love Adam & Eve, and the painful sexiness of it is just incredible. It captures all my favorite aspects of Ted Hughes's poetry, from the powerful confidence and easy rhythm of his voice to the sweeping pronouncements throughout his work.

Life List: Memorize & Internalize 10 Poems

2011-11-03T07:32:00.002-04:00

I've always liked memorizing poems, and since memorizing 10 is on my life list, I figured I'd bring us on a guided tour through the ones I've already memorized, and how they've treated me through the years.

Everything from Facts for Visitors (Srikanth Reddy)

She was watching the solar eclipse
through a piece of broken bottle

when he left home.
He found a blue kite in the forest

on the day she lay down
with a sailor. When his name changed,

she stitched a cloud to a quilt
made of rags. They did not meet,

so they never could be parted.
So she finished her prayer,

& he folded his map of the sea.

"Everything" is probably my favorite poem of all time, and one that has had a profound effect on my work since I read it in 2004. I read it in my first poetry class, my first year of college, and I feel like I've held it in my heart ever since. Memorizing it brought every line into clearer perspective, and having memorized a few more poems since, I think it was the most pleasurable to learn. I love "Everything" for the same reason I love Mrs Dalloway: the completeness of its brevity. I think I will spend the rest of my career trying to create something as full as those two works.

Reddy is also a poet I deeply admire, and his entire collection is exquisite. I hope this sampling* whets your appetite for more, because this is a book you should buy, whether you think you like poetry or not. He works out of Chicago, so I've only seen him read once, but he's also an incredible reader. You can hear for yourself at Poetry Foundation. Plus, he did the Iowa/Harvard program that I think is the greatest thing ever, so that's pretty incredible. I've been anxiously awaiting a second book from him since I finished this one, a few months after it came out.

Fun fact: I'm pretty sure that the ampersand at the end of this poem is where my tattoo comes from. The poem played a major role in our relationship. I cannot imagine not carrying this with me everyday. Without it, I would be a poorer human.

*I don't have permission to reprint this. Srikanth Reddy, if you have a google alert on your name and see this, feel free to email me and ask me to take it down. I can totally respect that. Other, more likely readers, go buy Facts for Visitors to assuage my guilt for breaking copyright laws. It's amazing.

Weekend Wanderings: Halloween

2011-10-31T20:35:00.000-04:00

I had a lovely, quietish weekend of readings and dance performances and a nice little housewarming and snow and a book sale. And tonight, back from my teaching class and the madness of West 4th Street, maybe I'll do a little reading, a little editing, and a little memorizing.

And also, I'll be fondly remembering some past Halloweens:

My first one, taken with a Polaroid camera. #HipsterSince1986 #NotReally

My 21st, taken at the greatest party ever thrown at SLC.

But perhaps the Halloween I am most fond of remembering was the one I spent in England half a decade ago. A few days before the holiday, Carlea and I were accosted by a small child screaming, "Trick or Treat!" in what I remember to be a monster costume. We said, "Aww! How cute!" and then meant to walk on our way. Only, then the child's mother accosted us, too. "Well, go on. Give him something," she said. And as we sort of flailed about saying, "Well, we don't have any candy, since, um, it's not Halloween right now. And, um, since we're on the street, and not sitting patiently by our door, we can't really give him a treat." She then informed us we were supposed to give him money. Oh. Culture shock, I guess.

We had a really fun party that evening, and for the second time in my life, I drank too much, and had to be carried home. I woke up the next morning, not hungover, and probably we roasted some vegetables and read a bit, and talked. Oxford was like that. There was an incredible costume shop that closed last year, and on the way home from it, you could walk through a tiny graveyard. Oxford was like that, too.

On Halloween that year, Neil Gaiman wrote the most wonderful op-ed article in the Times, and it seemed to really encapsulate everything I was feeling at the time. I still think it's wonderful. You should go read it; it's called "Ghosts in the Machine," and it's wonderful. The disquieting shadows he mentions, the haunting nature of October, the reminders that we live - Gaiman's prose is far from perfect, but his passion for stories, for narrative and immortality, is incredible. Go read the article, and then have a very happy Halloween.

{This Moment}

2011-10-28T07:16:00.001-04:00

{This Moment}

A Friday ritual inspired by Amanda Soule & many others.

Please feel free to share a link to your own moment in the comments.

Life List: Memorize & Internalize 10 Poems

2011-10-27T06:56:00.001-04:00

I've always liked memorizing poems, and since memorizing 10 is on my life list, I figured I'd bring us on a guided tour through the ones I've already memorized, and how they've treated me through the years.

Catullus II

Passer, deliciae meae puellae,
quicum ludere, quem in sinu tenere,
cui primum digitum dare appetenti
et acris solet incitare morsus,
cum desiderio meo nitenti
carum nescio quid lubet iocari
et solaciolum sui doloris,
credo ut tum grauis acquiescat ardor:
tecum ludere sicut ipsa possem
et tristis animi leuare curas!
TAM gratum est mihi quam ferunt puellae
pernici aureolum fuisse malum,
quod zonam soluit diu ligatam.

The second poem I memorized, "Catullus II," was in my eleventh grade Latin class. The class was wonderful - I loved learning Latin, I loved the teacher (who would let us order bacon-egg-and-cheese breakfast sandwiches in class and wrote me one of the kindest letters of recommendation I've ever read), and I loved that I was asked to memorize a poem. This poem is a really great one. If you don't read Latin (and, um, I definitely never really got the hang of it, so no shame there), this is a pretty basic translation. Ostensibly, it is a poem about a pet sparrow belonging to Catullus's lover, Lesbia. The poem apparently inspired a number of other poems about lovers' pets, which seems like a great topic to me. And, I can't remember if my Latin teacher told us this or not, but some people think the sparrow is really a metaphor for the penis. I feel like I should go and write a pet/penis poem right now.

{This Moment}

2011-10-22T14:38:00.001-04:00

Inspired by Amanda Soule
And on the road again.

Life List: Memorize & Internalize 10 Poems

2011-10-20T07:34:00.002-04:00

Probably you already know this, but I'm a poet.* And, one thing that poets seem to have do fairly often is memorize poems. I love this. I've always liked memorizing poems. As it turns out, I'm not terribly good at it. Mostly, I sort of remember them enough to get through my recitation. But, for all that I don't really remember any of the poems I've memorized, I do feel like I've internalized them, and that's more important than being able to spout them off at parties, I think.** So, I've decided to devote the next few Life List posts to the poems I've memorized, and why I love them.

Untitled Poem from The Baldwin Primer (May Kirk Scripture)

I love the name of Washington,
I love my country, too,
I love the flag, the dear old flag,
of red, white, and blue.

I memorized this poem sometime in second grade, after getting my Samantha doll. I think one of the books references the fact that Samantha had to memorize the poem, so of course I did, too. Then, I went around telling literally anyone who would listen to me recite it. I had to go back and find a copy of the primer to remember the poem, and I'd actually remembered it as being in some way related to religion (hmm, patriotism and religion? melded together in my second grade mind? you don't say...).

But, I do remember memorizing it, reading it out of a doll-sized book over and over again until the words stayed firmly in my mind. The topic was very near to my heart at the time, and I'm glad that the first poem I memorized was by a woman. Until I looked the piece up again, I'd been upset that I'd never memorized a poem by a woman, and it was nice to find out that this wasn't true. The short, rhyming nature of the poem makes it a perfect piece to memorize. It's pieces like this (and like Dr. Seuss) that gave me a sense of rhythm, and while the poem may have left my memory, its heavy iambs have been sitting in the back of my brain for almost twenty years.

*Some people might feel strange about self-identifying as a poet. Not me!
** Although, it is a fun party trick! You should try it one day.

Doing It All

2011-10-19T14:18:00.001-04:00

I know it's a pretty big cliche, but I think I don't know how she does it of almost everyone I know. My friends, my family, my tweeps: they all seem to do it all and to maintain a healthy balance in the process. I've heard that you can have anything you want, but you can't have it all at once, and this is something I believe and try to practice in my life. There are things I want now that I'm not even trying to try for (like freelancing full-time and owning a house), because I know some things just take time, and because they take more work than I'm ready to put in right now.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/29648757@N00/5009872377

But, I do want some things now, and I want to keep some peace in myself while I get them. These include:

Supporting myself financially and also having health insurance (also known as: working full time and being good enough at it to keep working full time)
Going to grad school full time to further pursue my dreams, and taking advantage of the opportunities grad school offers to improve myself as a poet, teacher, and human (including seminars, readings, and conferences, oh my!)
Being a better household partner by: doing the chores I am in charge of, namely laundry, on time, namely before we run out of undergarments; taking on some other chores so that Roger isn't the only person keeping our home together
Taking care of my health through:basic sustainable cooking, like making bread and hummus, so we can eat well and I can feel like I contribute more than laundry to the house; going to the farmers market for most of our food, instead of the grocery store; cutting back on meals out, especially ones that don't bring real joy to my life (like lunch); exercising more, either through yoga or running or the gym; sleeping as much as I need
Taking appropriate advantage of living in the city with events, adventures, and outings, along with a healthy balance of moments of quiet.

It really doesn't sound all that hard when I write it out. It sounds like, oh, I don't know. The reality of every other adult's life. But in practice, I am floundering. I am sort of barely able to keep things together on the first two, let alone the rest.

And, I am looking for tips. So, how do you do it all? (When Lauren answered it over here for me, I just about died with happiness that she didn't say, "Oh! I don't get it all done at all! Tee hee hee!" which seems to be the general answer I've gotten.)

Gratituesday: Sarah Lawrence College

2011-10-18T16:53:00.000-04:00

Have I mentioned before that I went to the world's best college? I did. When I applied, it wasn't totally on my radar, and the truth is, I sort of accidentally ended up there. For some bizarre reason, when I was applying to schools, I wanted something hyper-traditional, maybe something Jesuit or Ivy League.* Sarah Lawrence is none of these things. Instead, it's the best place in the United States for an undergraduate education, and, needless to say, the best accident that happened to me. Here's my brief** take on why:

The System. You take three classes per semester, and with each of them, you conduct conference work, and independent but interrelated project that goes along with the class. These projects can take on many incarnations (I once wrote a chapbook of poems for a psychology course on Human Resilience), but are often large-scale research papers. You meet individually with your professor every other week to discuss your ideas, research, and progress. The system is based off of Oxford and Cambridge's tutorial system, and it forces you to think for yourself, to focus academically in a way that many people never do. Classes are kept small (under 15 people) and are discussion-based. My reading load was incredibly heavy, writing was the primary focus in every class, and being able to hold my own in conversation was one of the best skills I learned there.
The Professors. They're amazing. The only ones who ever rang a false note with me were guest professors who didn't quite understand the system. Everyone else teaches what they love, and loves teaching. You have to, because even though a full-time schedule is only teaching two classes, you have to be available for conferences in addition to your classes. Every professor I had took my work seriously, and fostered my research. Some of the hardest-working, most generous people I know are professors there.
The Students. I think we SLCers can get a bad rap for being spoiled hipsters, and there's some truth to that stereotype. But we're also, for the most part, really brilliant and also fun. Even when I avoid my former classmate's eyes on the subway, even when I groan about trustfund babies, even though I am sick to death of art films - I love everyone I went to school with for making it such a special place. And also for coming to our Halloween party in 2007. You guys rocked.
The Bubble. When I decided to go to SLC, one of the women who used to frequent the beach I lifeguarded at told me, "Oh, that's a good school. They coddle you too much, but I guess that's what you get when you pay $40,000 for a year at college." Ouch. But, you know what, it's okay. She's right. The bubble, the coddling, the amazing world of studying and creating and building a thoughtful mind? That's what you pay for - the time to discover your passion and then to figure out how to build a life around it.

Yesterday, I began a certificate program for people who want to teach in higher education. We talked about our favorite professors, the best academic experiences we had, and how to replicate that in our own classrooms. Almost everyone in the room was teaching a massive course at my university, to undergraduates who pay almost as much as Sarah Lawrence undergraduates do. Almost everyone in the room felt totally lost, like they couldn't possibly give enough time to their students, and like they didn't know how to convey the teachings they wanted to. Some spoke of the rare professor in their college years who would talk to them for an hour, even though that professor had his own research to be doing and even though they were but a lowly undergraduate student, and how much that meant to them.

I never had that experience. I was never taught by a TA, let alone one who wasn't quite sure what they were doing. I never felt that I was wasting a professor's time because I wasn't a graduate student. While I know all teachers start somewhere, and that my professors didn't wake up one day and know all the secrets to building a good course, for the first time, after hearing these stories I realized what a privilege it was to be taught by professors who were not only tenured experts, but also who loved teaching and cared about undergraduates. When I grow up, this is who I want to be.

*Um, yes. I know. Was I totally off my rocker? Yes, pretty much I was.
** Seriously, I could go on for years about this. I have gone on for years about this. If you're thinking of applying, or just want to nerd-chat about pedagogy and higher education with me, shout out in the comments.

Weekend Wanderings: Work

2011-10-17T06:40:00.001-04:00

If you know me in real life, or you know me on twitter, you know that I've been exhausted and sick and overworked recently. In trying to remedy that, I refused all invitations for this weekend (including: 3 readings, 2 brunches, 1 dance performance, 1 race, and 1 concert - am I always this popular? I really don't think so), and stayed in to get some work done.

The miraculous thing? It seems to have worked. I didn't finish everything on my to-do list, but I finished a lot of it, and I feel so much better about the state of my life. It was also really nice to be able to focus on the one "outing" we had, which was having a delicious brunch at Kitchenette with our friend Rachel (of Vermont fame). I tend to pack weekends so full that I hardly remember what I did or who I saw, and so it was nice to really slow the pace down. Even though I still have a cough, and even though some things still need to get done (don't some things always still need to get done?), I'm feeling more relaxed and prepared than I have in a long time. Thank goodness.


Yep. The kitty is beginning to sneak inside.

Gratitudesday: Not the Baby Cat

2011-10-11T18:49:00.002-04:00

This weekend, we saw our wonderful friends from Boston, Molly & Laura:

and had a delicious meal prepared for us by Rob & Simone:

and celebrated my sister's 22nd birthday:

So there was a lot to be grateful for, but the most wonderful of all was, I think, the discovery of a little kitty who lives on our scaffolding, and whom I now feed everyday. We think he's been sneaking in through the window while we're out, and hope that he'll come in on a more regular basis soon. We already love him to bits. He's a little hard to photograph, because he's all black and has mostly been hanging out at night, but here's a brief glimpse:

{This Moment}

2011-10-07T09:06:00.002-04:00

{This Moment}

A Friday ritual inspired by Amanda Soule & many others.

Please feel free to share a link to your own moment in the comments.

Gratitudesday: Cures & Remedies

2011-10-04T22:40:00.000-04:00

Today, I'm loving so many things, including the wonderful poetry reading I went to this afternoon, and all the amazing friends I have been seeing lately, and also air mattresses.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/14516334@N00/309391023

Namely, though, I am loving the certitude with which my body is telling me that I need to slow down. Two weekends of too much drinking, two weeks of not getting enough sleep or eating enough vegetables, loading on the work-work and the school-work: it's all a little too much for me, and the low-grade cold I've got is really making me feel it, and slow down a little. (Only a little - after this presentation tomorrow, I still have happy hour on Thursday, and Leah visiting this week and Molly & Laura visiting this weekend, and my family coming down for my sister's birthday on Sunday, but I'm slowing down in my mind.) So, I'm trying to take it a little easier. And eating soup and orange juice for lunch, and trying to get some extra sleep in the middle of this busy moment.

But, I'm always up for suggestions. I have class most of tomorrow, but I would love to have a recipe for Thursday evening - a big, easy soup with lots of garlic - and anything else that makes you feel better when you're not feeling so well.

Weekend Wanderings: Wine

2011-10-03T22:59:00.000-04:00

We had a really lovely weekend, filled with wine tasting, car rides, homemade biscuits, sleeping late, and old friends. Now, back to a really hectic week (happily - a busy week of work and projects and even more friends!), I'm glad to have had the little pause.

{This Moment}

2011-09-30T19:07:00.002-04:00

A Friday ritual inspired by Amanda Soule.

Worlds of Wonder: Our Apartment!

2011-09-29T22:34:00.001-04:00

So, after all your really nice comments this weekend about how no one's house is finished and how everyone understands that it won't be perfect for a long time, I was all set to take and post some pictures of our very-close-to-complete apartment. I told Roger about my plan after we'd spent about a half hour putting up our honeycombesque mother-of-pearl lamp. In the ceiling. By ourselves. I was proud of us, and thought that the apartment was really basically done, and that it was time to take some pictures.

Well. You should have seen the look of horror on his face. "Pictures?! On the blog?! It isn't ready! You can't do that! We haven't even put shelves up!" So, friends, we're going to delay the real pictures until next week, when we've moved one of our paintings and put shelves up over the butcher's block and hung up our coat rack and can really and truly call the living room and kitchen done. (You'll also get pictures of the bathroom, which has been totally finished since day 3; the hallway, which is pretty much mostly done; and our bedroom which is done as far as furniture goes but will also most likely be repainted green in the next few months.) Sorry for the wait.

But, you know I wouldn't leave you hanging. Or, erm, wouldn't leave you hanging after a month of leaving you hanging. So, without further pause, here are the before and after pictures from the apartment. On the left, you'll see a photo of the apartment as it was when we put down our deposit. On the right, we'll have an image of the apartment as it was the day we got the keys, after a pretty basic remodel of the kitchen, a refurbishing of all the floors, and a repainting of all the walls. It will hopefully give you an idea of the layout of the apartment, and show you what we've been working with for the past six weeks. Enjoy, and if you have any suggestions for what you'd do, I'd love to hear them in the comments!

The entrance to the apartment. Note the fancy light fixture and long, long hallway to the bedroom.


The living room, pictured from the kitchen.

A closer view of our little kitchen.

Our bedroom, on the other side of that long hall. Note the double closet + linen closet.

The other side of our bedroom, with a lovely window gate. We are so hardcore/eyesore.

No "before" pictures here, but they are: kitchen/living room; long hallway; 2 views of our bathroom.

And there you have it - doux chez soi. Join us back here next week for some pictures of the place wearing its fancy clothes!

Gratitudesday: Graduate School

2011-09-27T20:18:00.003-04:00

When I first arrived at Sarah Lawrence in 2004, I'd already decided to get an MFA afterward. I walked into my Don's office at her first meeting and told her that was my plan. I remember this clearly because she said, "Well, that's fine. If you were going to stay in English, I'd tell you to make sure you took at least one language and start making sure your courses vary widely enough. But if you're getting an MFA, just take whatever interests you and make sure you have a good portfolio at the end of it."

Admittedly, two years later, in Oxford, I had a change of heart, and felt like all I could possibly do was get a PhD. I went through a lot of steps to get there (like learning a language in three months and reading the better part of the entire Norton Anthology), and for a lot of reasons, it didn't work out. And while I think I would have done really well in one,* I don't regret not trying again after I was rejected the first time, and I'm glad I had time to think things over after college before jumping straight into something. Applying to the MFA wasn't a last resort - it was a return to my first choice. I didn't do it because I couldn't get into a PhD, or because I was unemployed and couldn't think of anything better to do, or because I have too much money and not enough sense to invest it, or for any of the other reasons people have actually suggested to my face.** I did it because I believe it is going to get me to where I want to be.

I know a lot of people are going to disagree with me on this, but the MFA is a terminal degree. I'm getting it for two big reasons: to improve my poetry through practice and because it will qualify me to teach at the college level when I'm done. I probably won't get tenure at Princeton as soon as I graduate, but I do feel confident that I'll get an adjunct position somewhere, and that I will eventually publish a book, and that I will somehow be able to cobble together a career, and a life, by doing the things I love. And for now, without teaching? My first class felt like coming home. I'm feeling inspired, not just exhausted, by life in the city, and while the poems are coming slower than I want, they're still making their way here. I love the people in my program, I love my professors, I love going to readings and getting invitations to submit things and most of all, I love being surrounded by poetry. I love feeling like this thing, this big, wonderful thing, is real.

It's never been too difficult for me to get where I'm meant to be, so long as I get out of my own way.

*And by "done really well," I mostly mean, "stuck it out." I don't have any delusions that I would have won prestigious fellowships and done totally brilliant work and been a star student at Cornell or Rutgers, (my top two choices) though it was possible. I mainly mean that I wouldn't have dropped out the way most of my peers seemed to. Seriously, of the ten or so friends I have who went into PhDs straight out of college, only three are still in them, and one of those three is probably going to drop out after he gets his Masters.
**Everyone's a critic, but not everyone sees the intrinsic value of poetry in contemporary society.

Weekend Wanderings: Classic

2011-09-26T19:11:00.001-04:00

Yesterday, I was sitting outside the laundromat, as one does when it's sweltering and crowded inside. Reading some Sophocles for class, I had my head down, and heard a car pulling up, blasting Beyonce's latest hit. I looked up and saw what may be the cutest thing in the world:

The little boy pulled to a stop, yelled into the laundromat, "Mommy! Mommy, we're here!" and opened his car door before running inside, leaving his little sister in the car, crying. I thought the adorable would kill me, but it only got cuter. Soon, a group of little kids, none older than six or seven, had gathered around the car, asking the same questions I've seen adults ask at those Classic Car Cruises they have in our McDonald's parking lots on Thursday nights in the summer. "What kind of a car is that?" "How does it run?" "Can I drive it?"

Jill and I had a similar car when we were growing up, but I'm pretty sure that rolling up on a city street in it makes it about a million times more awesome than going up and down your driveway (which was still really awesome). This, along with a little kid I saw watching a cockroach crawl down the sidewalk, has made me decide that the only way to really write about New York City is through the lens of Little City Boy, my newest character. I'm pretty sure he has a balloon. Just saying.

So. Much. Cute.

Other than that, the weekend was pretty wonderful. I'm sure you'll be shocked to hear our super never came back, but I did get some work done, do a ton of laundry, go to the farmer's market (finally!) manage to get in a good run (though, my, isn't it frustrating to start again after a long absence?!), and drink at more bars in two days than I normally would in two months (a total of ten different places - you can see my thoughts on each one over at Yelp). Plus, Roger hung our lamp up, so we're getting dangerously close to finished in the living room. Overall, I'd say it was a pretty-successful, very laid-back, much-needed weekend.

Blog Update

2011-09-24T13:13:00.001-04:00

We spent last night eating and drinking way more than we normally would, thanks to NY Craft Beer Week and $3 beers. We stopped at Good Beer, Rattle n' Hum, The Ginger Man, and Jimmy 43, in addition to X'ian Famous Foods, Pommes Frites, and Kornet Pizza. This decidedly uncharacteristic for us, but we had a great time, and plan on trying some more places closer to the apartment tonight.

Needless to say, I woke up feeling less than my usual perky self, particularly cranky because the super was supposed to come and fix our window at 10am. It's 1pm now, so I'm going to assume he's not going to make it, and leave for a run in a little bit. But, in the meantime, (and instead of doing homework) I've been twiddling away at this blog, customizing it for the first time. Mostly I've used templates straight as they come, but after deciding to put together a real header, I went hog wild and created the masterpiece that you see below, complete with customized colors:

Some tabs I have open: Hill Figure, Plague Doctor Costume, Little Ice Age; Jen's Vegetarian Chili

I know. "Wow" is all you can think. Pretty snazzy stuff. I even edited the HTML on my snazzy new Goodreads widget to make it all fit where I wanted it! And now, there are a few sidebar pictures of me because I've decided that I'm going to embrace myself a little more this fall. Obviously this isn't the world's greatest design job, but it's about a million lightyears away from where I was at 10am, so I'm pretty pleased. I'll probably continue to tweak a little (I sort of want shades of white, not blue), and I'm planning to update the header on a semi-regular basis. If you guys have any suggestions for design changes or content changes, let me know, and in the meantime, say goodbye to those little birdies in the upper right hand corner.

Bye, little birdies, they sang.

{This Moment}

2011-09-23T08:52:00.000-04:00

{This Moment}

A Friday ritual inspired by Amanda Soule & many others.

Please feel free to share a link to your own moment in the comments.

Everything Advantageous to Life

2011-09-22T23:59:00.000-04:00

It's been so long, I hardly know where to begin. Since we last spoke (because I really do think of all these little blogs as a dialogue), we:

picked out a couch (the Rowley, for those of you who were held in suspense this whole time)
moved into the new place (an experience that, despite going as well as it could possibly have gone, and as quickly, and as smoothly, was so painful I've decided that unless we are leaving New York City, I am going to die in this apartment - that is how little I want to move every again. Or at least for the next two years.)
spent a long time painfully setting things up with no table, no couch, and no internet
purchased a huge amount of "necessary" stuff for the apartment, like fancy blinds, fancy dishes, and not so fancy frying pans. (Newly necessary item: a black/silver microwave to replace the one I broke a few days ago.)
got into our first "living together" fight
got over our first "living together" fight
realized we had flies in our apartment because there were no screens in the windows and they were coming in from the scaffolding outside our apartment, moments before realizing there were flies on the scaffolding because our neighbors throw their food and trash onto it
survived a hurricane, family reunion, and wedding in our first month of living together
opened our first joint bank account
started school (which is just wonderful. More on that in the coming days, undoubtedly)
got Roger a job (well, that was mostly Roger's doing. But I helped by asking useful questions like, "What's the salary?" and "How much does it pay?" Repeatedly.)
helped Shelby pick out a wedding dress (well, this was mostly me. But Roger did a kick-ass job at arranging pastries for us to eat afterward.)
eventually got the couches after much wringing of hands, and filled their wonderful drawers with knitting supplies, DVDs, and Roger's papers.
instituted a date night and started writing Yelp reviews of every restaurant we go to
and finally, oh, finally, got the internet yesterday, along with our first electricity bill. We truly are real people now.

So, I think we're mostly caught up on my end! On your end? Well, I still haven't had much time to read any blogs, but it seems that everyone is getting pregnant, moving moving moving, or making otherwise similarly large-scale life changes. And you know what? You all seem to manage to keep blogging through it just fine.

Not me. I'm having more difficulty finishing the apartment than I thought I would. (We're so close, but we need to print and frame a few more photographs and buy one more big print for the bedroom and get one more bookshelf so we can put away our last box of books. Oh, my. So many books. And also, we might still paint. We decided against it, and we have tons of stuff on the walls, but it still feels really barren to me.) I'm adjusting really well to city life, better than I thought I would, and I'm resisting the feeling of "I am wasting my time if I'm not doing everything all at once!!!" But, I've mostly stopped running, haven't been to the farmer's market yet, and my writing feels really strange to me right now. I'm still trying to get myself on a schedule that includes everything I love, and also lets me sleep for a few hours a night.

And what I was really hoping was that a week into moving in, I'd have all sorts of lovely pictures to show you of our lovely place with our lovely furniture and our lovely selves. But, what I had instead was one sweaty couple, eating cereal out of mugs on the floor with nothing hung on the walls. So, I thought, okay, two weeks. Which turned to five, and which still isn't really done. I've been hesitant to post any pictures, to have anyone visit, because it still feels like a work in progress. The sort of work in progress that I am right now, where I'm reading a lot of poetry and thinking a lot about my work and my positionality, and also not really doing the dishes or wearing anything but the same pair of jeans. But, guys, you're going to get pictures soon, and they aren't going to be perfect. And that's okay. Because I'm not perfect either, and I think you're all okay with that.

Plus, if there's one thing we do have, that's perfectly lovely bookshelves. And who doesn't like a good bookshelf picture?

Oh, guys. I missed you. Now, since you're all totally brilliant: any suggestions for affordable black or silver microwaves? And more importantly, for a nice, sort of artsy print to put between the two windows in our bedroom? The space on the wall is about 3' wide by 4' tall, and we'd want to put a frame around it.

Storm Warnings

2011-08-27T11:47:00.000-04:00

One of my favorite poems of all time, I read "Storm Warnings" for the first time in 11th grade. I remembered it for years, but couldn't find it again until I wrote to my high school English teacher while I was still in college asking for the writer. Since then, I read it once every few months. (The re-reading is, I think, one of the things I love most about poetry.) Earlier this week, all I wanted was to read bog poems, but as soon as all this craziness with Hurricane Irene began, I immediately thought of "Storm Warnings."

It's a lovely piece, so I thought I'd share it with you now, to help you weather this storm. (We're not being evacuated, and in fact, our part of the city should be safe no matter what level hurricane we face, but we're still at the grocery store downloading some good e-books and buying candles and bread.)

http://www.spaceref.com/news/viewsr.html?pid=38148

Storm Warnings

The glass has been falling all the afternoon,
And knowing better than the instrument
What winds are walking overhead, what zone
Of grey unrest is moving across the land,
I leave the book upon a pillowed chair
And walk from window to closed window, watching
Boughs strain against the sky

And think again, as often when the air
Moves inward toward a silent core of waiting,
How with a single purpose time has traveled
By secret currents of the undiscerned
Into this polar realm. Weather abroad
And weather in the heart alike come on
Regardless of prediction.

Between foreseeing and averting change
Lies all the mastery of elements
Which clocks and weatherglasses cannot alter.
Time in the hand is not control of time,
Nor shattered fragments of an instrument
A proof against the wind; the wind will rise,
We can only close the shutters.

I draw the curtains as the sky goes black
And set a match to candles sheathed in glass
Against the keyhole draught, the insistent whine
Of weather through the unsealed aperture.
This is our sole defense against the season;
These are the things we have learned to do
Who live in troubled regions.

-Adrienne Rich

{This Moment}

2011-08-19T19:26:00.001-04:00

Stormy night in Harlem.
Inspired by Amanda Soule.

Moving On Up

2011-08-09T11:49:00.001-04:00

We're moving!* You probably already knew that, but just in case you didn't, and you were wondering whether I was ever coming back to this blog or twitter or email or anything else I'm behind on, I am, but it may not be too soon. We move in on Saturday, and until then I'll be waist deep in boxes and after that, I may not have internet. So, I'll be back with pictures of our gorgeous new place soon, but until then, I leave you with this image of my wonderful, cuddly, adorable packing buddy, who sadly won't be able to move with us.

*For the curious, we're moving to a fancy part of Harlem. It's a dream. A beautiful, newly renovated apartment with wood floors and tons of light; in our price range; 30 minutes from work and school for both of us; AND in a super-cute neighborhood with lots of restaurants, a farmer's market, and several friends. It's the perfect place for us to start out this real-life-together thing, and I could not be happier!

{This Moment}

2011-08-05T07:52:00.005-04:00

{This Moment}

A Friday ritual inspired by Amanda Soule & many others.

Please feel free to share a link to your own moment in the comments.

Worlds of Wonder: Grand Central Station

2011-08-03T23:59:00.004-04:00

What is there to say about Grand Central Station that hasn't already been worn out by a million sayings? I read a short story once where a man wanders around the station, and eventually gets lost in one of its many tunnels, finding himself in the past. No one accepts his money, but he loves being there, and writes a letter to his wife via his antique post-card collection and tells her he won't be coming home, ever. That's how much people love GC. You get lost there, and then you decide being lost there is better than being home.

http://walkinnewyork.blogspot.com/

Although I'm tired beyond belief of the MetroNorth Railroad, and am looking forward to a much shorter commute in the coming weeks, I'm a bit sorry I won't have an excuse to stand in GC with my neck craned, staring at those incredible ceiling paintings. Still, I am looking forward to passing through for weekend trips home, for the Christmas market there this holiday season, and for the day, perhaps one day in the distant future, when someone offers to bring me to the Campbell Apartment for a drink and then whispers sweet nothings to me over the archways at the Oyster Bar.

Gratitudesday: Baby Cat

2011-08-02T22:17:00.000-04:00

So, I don't really have time to write the post Baby Cat deserves, but I love him to itty bitty bits. He's a celebrity,* he's a drunkard, he's adorable beyond words. The first time I met him, he was just a tiny baby, and he fell asleep in the crook of my arm, and I fell in love. Then I cried because I love him so much.** So, rather than a real post about why I love him, I'll leave you with two goofy pictures I just took of him on my cell phone, and this quote from Roger: "Having the Baby Cat stay with us for a weekend makes this apartment real."

Baby Cat Knows What's Up


Why Did I Post This Unflattering Picture of Myself? I Don't Know.

We do actually have some pretty nice pictures of the cat, but his charm is really in these adorable candid shots. He lies on his back like a baby, he sits like a person (and was sitting that way when I tried to take the picture of both of us), and sometimes he gets himself stuck on the roof or trapped outside in the rain, only to cry until someone rescues him. Then, he comes inside and cries more, curled up next to my mother, until he feels better or falls asleep. Baby Cat and me, we are soul-people.

*Erica's blog, even the bit that isn't about Baby Cat, is pretty rad, if you love cats and hipster-living. When I grow up, I want to be as awesome as Erica.
**True story.

Weekend Wanderings: Packages

2011-08-01T22:09:00.003-04:00

Oh man, you guys. This weekend. It was a doozie. The back story you may need, because I don't think I've mentioned it on here before, is that Roger and I signed on our first place a few weeks ago, and we're looking forward to moving to Harlem in about two weeks. We're both really excited for different reasons, but also, turns out that moving in with someone you adore isn't really that much less stressful than any of the other moves I've made.

You may not know this about me, but I don't handle change well, and I hate packing. I don't like packing for weekend trips or long vacations or school-years, and I seriously, seriously do not like packing up every object I own, including approximately a billion books. I actually don't totally hate the process of moving, despite the fact that every single time I've ever done it (and that's a total of 14 times between 2004-2009) it's been either over 90*F or raining, because it signals an end to the packing, and a beginning to my favorite part of moving: settling in. I'm pretty sure I've never moved without shedding at least one tear, and sometimes I end up heaving and then passing out from hyperventilating. Like Saturday. I'll spare you the details, but let's just say I'm not great at compromise and also life-transitions are just hard. So, let's focus on the good parts of this weekend, which don't involve wrapping twine around books or donating the world's largest garbage bag of clothes.

My parents have very generously offered to buy Roger and me a couch set. Despite the unattractive behavior of the day before, we had a really nice time hopping from couch-to-couch at Bob's Discount Furniture and Raymore & Flanagan, deciding which was the most comfortable, which was the most attractive, and which was a livable combination somewhere within our self-imposed budget. We still have to move most of our things in and measure everything, but we're pretty sure we've narrowed it down to two sets:

The Tessa - "My Tessa Collection is a classy nod to mid-century modern style! Tailored beautifully throughout, like a well-made, expensive suit! The coordinating decorator throw pillows in neutral colors, will match any decor. This high end look would cost hundreds, if not thousands more in those hoity-toity stores. Why pay more?! Get the same look and save a bundle! Only at my Bob's!" What We Like: much nicer fabric in a better color, smaller structure would fit better in the apartment, fancy shape and overall design, remarkably comfortable.

The Tessa

The Rowley - "My Rowley Collection is a storage lover's dream. The sofa, loveseat, chair and ottoman, all have built in storage compartments. Tidying up the living room has never been easier! Hide magazines, remotes, blankets, toys and more...in the blink of an eye! You get comfort, style, and storage galore without breaking the bank! Only at my Bob's! Why pay more?" What We Like: storage drawers under your legs, having an individual middle cushion, slightly more comfortable than the Tessa, bigger/better for sleep-overs.

The Rowley (storage drawers not displayed)

We've been taking votes on Facebook and gmail to see which one to get, but if you've got opinions, let me know! Right now, the Rowley is in the lead, but it could be anyone's game.

We also stopped at Stew Leonard's, which I loved as a kid because of all the singing animatronics and petting zoos and free samples, and which I love as an adult because of their amazing food selection and good work practices and free samples. During our successful communal food experiment senior year of college, we had a Stew's just a few miles away, and we went at least twice a month. Now, we probably go closer to twice a year, but it's still just as appealing. Spending part of Sunday afternoon there made the whole weekend seem better, and the really delicious-looking lobster rolls they had out just made us all the more excited to go to the beach next weekend.

{This Moment}

2011-07-29T06:51:00.003-04:00


Photo by Tabitha Pearson Marshall for The Mahopac News.

{This Moment}

A Friday ritual inspired by Amanda Soule & many others.

Please feel free to share a link to your own moment in the comments,

and do click here for more information about my moment this week.

Gratitudesday: Harry Potter

2011-07-26T23:24:00.000-04:00

I finally saw the final Harry Potter film today (after two or three weeks of watching all of the other films, most of which I'd never seen before), and so I just wanted to take a moment to mention how grateful I am for Harry Potter. The movies seem to get much better at year five and on, and while I've enjoyed them, and would definitely recommend seeing this most recent one, it isn't really the films I'm most grateful for, it's the books. The books, pre-toys and pre-movies and definitely pre-amusement parks. Today, I was thrilled to feel that slight trill at the opening sequence for the movie theater (who knew a fake roller-coaster with giant popping corn could bring back so many memories of hot summer days spent in freezing air conditioning with giant bags of candy?), but it's the books that will always have my heart.

I've said before that the books didn't change my life, didn't spark my desire to be a writer, didn't bring about my deep love of stories. Still, they were wonderful. They certainly helped form my views of the world, certainly transported me in the way that only a good story can. I love them as fully as I love Mrs Dalloway and The Sound and the Fury, and in a much deeper part of my soul, where I keep Goodnight, Moon, Of Mice & Men, and certain memorized poems. I love them in just the spot where I keep walking down the streets in Oxford, and the first time Roger held my hand, and the view of just barely peeking over the counter at a video rental place in the Bronx and seeing an eraser on a ballpoint pen. I don't know if I want to have children, but I've been imagining reading them these books just before bed for years.

It was never Harry Potter that made me want to write, but if I could ever make just one person carry with them my work as deeply as I carry Rowling's, I think I'll consider myself a success. Thanks for a great twelve years, JK!

Weekend Wanderings: Gatherings

2011-07-25T21:30:00.000-04:00

Showing off Shelby's Ring

Another weekend raced by with me still not caught up! But, like the last one (which I skipped over, but which involved seeing The Comedy of Errors at Boscobel, barbecuing in Bed-Stuy and seeing Allison & Dan for the first time since we visited them in April), it was wonderful. The first (and, to me, most exciting!) thing we did was sign our very first lease together on Thursday. You'll no doubt hear much, much more about this in the weeks to come, but we could not be happier to be moving to Manhattan. And yes, I'm saying that for the Mad Men-esque tone of it.

The Happy Couple

On Friday, we celebrated another very exciting commitment, Shelby and Mike's engagement. Shelby's parents took all four of us out to dinner at their favorite restaurant, Desert Sun, and we enjoyed several tropical drinks each. I can't remember exactly what they're called, something with "razzle" in the name, but goodness. They're delicious. We ate, drank, and goofed around for the evening, and generally had an amazing time.

Allison & Rachel at George's

Dave, Post-Hair Cut

Shelby and I woke up early to go with her father to the gym (it was already too hot to go running outside by 7am), and I was reminded of just how much I would love to have her around everyday to be my gym buddy. I finished writing an article I can't wait to share with you all this Thursday, and then Roger, Dave and I met Allison and Rachel for breakfast at George's, which was the perfect antidote to a good workout! I'd planned to go to the goodbye parties of two friends in the city that evening, but we were really exhausted, and ended up floating around in the pool for, I kid you not, two and a half hours. I'm still sorry I didn't get to see those friends, but the rest was really deeply needed, and I felt much better afterward. We planned to make pickles, but that fell by the wayside after we picked up the ingredients and ice cream AND cut Dave's hair (I made them today, more information to come soon). Roger and I spent the evening catching up on Harry Potter (we're watching all the movies before we see the final one tomorrow), and of course, I fell asleep during it. Still, the 6th one may be my favorite yet!

Me, Jessie, and Aunt Julie

Yesterday, I trekked out to Pennsylvania for my soon-to-be-cousin Jessie's bridal shower. The food was great, the fruit punch was even better, and best of all was seeing all my relatives, including baby Madilyn, who was born in February. We played some games, watched Jessie open her lovely gifts, and caught up on family gossip. It was a great shower, made even better by the fact that one of our favors were empty plastic containers - to fill with all the different cookies and baked goods that were set up at the back of the room - a really great idea, and one I would definitely copy at a party someday soon! And, when I came home, Roger was ready to watch Deathly Hallows. I, you guessed it... slept.

Gratitudesday: My BFFL

2011-07-19T20:43:00.002-04:00

2010

On Friday morning, I received an elated text message from my best friend, Shelby. "Mike proposed to me last night!" I couldn't have been happier for them, and in celebration of this happy moment, I think now is a good time to introduce you all to Shelby, and explain why I love her so much.

2004

2002

Shelby and I have been friends since we met in our 7th grade girl scout troop. I don't know how exactly it happened, though I bet it was at Lauren's house, and before long, we were besties, staying up all night eating cookie dough and watching movies in my air-conditioned living room, swimming and canoeing across our local lake, and getting enormous smoothies at a nearby ice cream shop. There was horseback riding at Rocking Horse Ranch, sleepovers all around our neighborhood, and lots of time at the beach. I know this sounds idyllic, but it's all true. I had a really exquisite childhood, and Shelby played a huge roll in that.

2003

2005

In high school, we went to school together for the first time. After going to private school for elementary school and middle school, Shelby joined us at public school and we had a blast. The summer before we started, Shelby would look through our friend Jessie's yearbook to get a sense of who she was going to meet in the fall. When the year started, she joined the musical to meet new people, and eventually got Jessie and me hooked on theater. We went to Harry Potter book release parties, visited England and Ireland for the first time, saw all of the Lord of the Rings movies (and decided we were most like Merry and Pip), and had an Anne of Green Gables picnic by a pond near my house. Shelby even got me my first job, lifeguarding at our lake.

2006

2005

In college, we went in different directions; I moved south to study literature at Sarah Lawrence, while Shelby headed north to Saint Rose, where she majored in biology. We made new friends, and didn't see each other very often, but we talked constantly and visited when we could. Shelby came to see me when I was at Oxford, and I went to Tulip Fest in Albany. We stayed put after graduating, but never stopped chatting or trying new things. Shelby introduced me to running, invited me to my first Pampered Chef party, and helped continue my love of going to tea. We've talked through our first jobs, our first apartments, our relationships, and all the hardships and triumphs of "real life." We send each other at least 50 text messages a week, so I was only too happy to hear about her good news that way.

2011

Her mother, being even more excited than me, had broken the news on facebook at 3am, right after it happened, and Shelby wanted to make sure I didn't find out secondhand. Of course, I called her right after I got out of work, and we talked about the proposal, wedding plans, and general excitement. In over a decade of friendship, I don't think I've ever seen her so happy (although, seeing the Tardis in London may be a close second), and I could not be happier for her. Congratulations, Shelby! And, congratulations to Mike, who is one of the luckiest guys I know!

Gratituesday on Monday: Lucky in Love

2011-07-11T21:00:00.001-04:00

Yesterday, facebook alerted Roger and me to a very important fact:

Um, how hip are our facebook photos? So hip.

I know. As if we didn't remember that today, this little relationship of ours turns seven years old and gets to go to second grade. Depending on who you are, this could either be lucky, or not so lucky, but I'm going to put my bets on the lucky side, because I bet the majority of people who meet when they are 15 and 17 probably don't date for that long. Yes. We are the dark horse of love.

In any event, Roger recently told me I have to stop talking to my online friends about him, so instead of gushing about how perfectly wonderful he can be or telling the adorable story of what we were doing exactly seven years ago today, I'll just say this: after trips to 26 states/7 countries/3 continents, after living in one Brooklyn bedroom in August and four-thousand miles apart with limited communication, after years of talking and screaming and crying and laughing and getting matching tattoos, after endless conversations about African art and cultural theory and Virginia Woolf and Will & Kate, after watching endless episodes of Hoarders and the Harry Potter films, after sharing one car for almost six months in the suburbs, after possibly figuring out our first apartment, after inadvertently wearing coordinating clothes this morning, we're still in this thing together and we're still in love.

Matching outfit twins!

And after seven years, I'd say that's pretty lucky.

{This Moment}

2011-07-01T19:32:00.000-04:00

{This Moment}

A Friday ritual inspired by Amanda Soule & many others.

Please feel free to share a link to your own moment in the comments.

World of Wonder: Mexico

2011-06-29T22:19:00.003-04:00

I don't know if I'm obsessed with Mexico right now because I just finished Born to Run and can't think of anything cooler than being capable of running around northern Mexican cliffs,* or if it's because everyone and their mother has been to the Caribbean and liked it way more than I do, or what. I just really, really want to sit around on some problematic beach at some problematic resort and not worry about paying for drinks or doing anything except hiking some ruins and getting tan. There. I said it. I just want to be normal for a few days.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/91883096@N00/3404247622

And, normal, to me, right now, apparently, is being in Mexico. Were I there now, I would be drinking a margarita, eating something spicy and delicious, looking at art, hiking those ruins, swimming, and sunbathing. I don't know if it will actually happen come December (as I am tentatively hoping it will), and I actually sort of believe it won't, but either way, at this moment, it all just sounds really lovely.

Gratituesday: Equality

2011-06-28T21:32:00.001-04:00

http://www.flickr.com/photos/22714323@N06/3117356986

Like almost everyone I know, I'm so proud New York has finally approved gay marriage. I have a lot of thoughts on the issue, but I'm not really sure how to phrase them all, so I'll just say that I'm deeply grateful to be in this place, at this time, and leave you with a really lovely statement that's been floating around APW a lot lately:

“Marriage is a vital social institution. The exclusive commitment of two individuals to each other nurtures love and mutual support. Marriage is at once a deeply personal commitment to another human being and a highly public celebration of the ideals of mutuality, companionship, intimacy, fidelity, and family. Because it fulfils yearnings for security, safe haven, and connection that express our common humanity, the decision whether and whom to marry is among life’s momentous acts of self-definition. It is undoubtedly for these reasons, as well as for its intimately personal significance, that civil marriage has long been termed a ‘civil right’. Without the right to marry, one is excluded from the full range of human experience.”

- Margaret Marshall, Massachusetts Supreme Court, 2003

Weekend Wanderings: Unplanned

2011-06-27T06:42:00.001-04:00

So, I went into this weekend with only one expectation: to work on a presentation for work. Needless to say, that didn't get done. So it goes. The weekend was far from a bust, though, and on Friday, I somehow miraculously made it home in time to apply for an Enhanced Driver's License. So, now, not only will I be able to get into bars again, I'll also be able to get into Canada and Mexico without a passport. Provided I arrive there by land or sea. SCORE!

Given my fabulous new eligibility to drive again, I spent Saturday morning waiting for my car to be inspected (and then to get new tires and a new alignment). This was also less painful than it sounds, since I spent a good portion of the waiting time eating a grilled blueberry muffin at the diner next door, and the rest of the time reading Born to Run, which I'm enjoying immensely. Once I made it home, Roger, Dave and I wandered over to a neighbor's tag sale, where I purchased a set of 12 Spode Christmas Tree mugs and tea plates, with an ashtray, creamer, sugar bowl, and candlesticks for $30, because I thought it matched my parents' Nikko set. It didn't, and after thinking back on theirs and comparing them, I actually think their set is much more elegant. Still, I decided to put aside childish dreams of a Tiffany set (which I, um, actually think is sort of ugly) and keep the Spode ones for myself and the Anglophile that resides in my heart. When I looked up the set, it turns out that if they were all bought individually, they would have cost almost $600. I'm pretty happy with the deal. Basically, I am a big dork and spend an inordinate amount of time thinking about place settings. But, if it makes you feel better, please know that I considered putting up pictures of all three of these settings and decided to spare you. You're welcome. Yes.

After this, I went for a five-mile run, and felt amazing. I'm paying for it now in sore legs, but while I was doing it, everything felt great. It gives me a little more hope for the race I'm running on July 4th. I'd only planned to be out for a little while, so by the time I got back, we only had 20 minutes before we had to leave to meet up for lunch with Rachel. Being able to take a shower and get ready in that time was almost as much of a feat as the run was, but we made it, and ate way, way too much Chili's. I spent the rest of the afternoon doing what felt like endless loads of laundry and reading (the book is seriously good), before making some zucchini for dinner. Dinner was followed by Roger making a giant butter cookie (see below for the recipe), and all of us eating it with blueberry port. Yes, I had a good work out, but I also consumed my weight in food. Sigh.

Sunday was decidedly less adventurous, consisting mainly of a one-mile run, folding those never-ending loads of laundry, and eating and reading even more, along with the tiniest bit of work and some planning for our annual Independence Day barbecue. My contributions? Macaroni & cheese, earl grey iced tea, and basil lemonade. Roger's contribution? Vodka gummy bears. Perfect.

One Giant Butter Cookie

adapted from How to Cook Everything

1 stick butter

3/4 cup sugar

1 1/2 teaspoons vanilla extract

1 egg

2 cups flour

1/2 teaspoon baking powder

a pinch of salt

a pinch of cinnamon

1/4 milk

1/2 cup crushed walnuts

Preheat over to 375° F. Cream together butter and sugar. Beat in vanilla and egg until well-blended, adding in dry ingredients and then milk to create a sticky consistency before mixing in the crushed walnuts. Now comes the messy part. Scoop everything onto a cookie sheet and shape into something resembling a giant cookie. Try to make it the same thickness all around. Bake until browned on the edges and cooked through in the middle, about 15 minutes. When just barely cooled, break off little pieces and enjoy with strawberry jam and blueberry port.

{This Moment}

2011-06-24T09:19:00.000-04:00

{This Moment}

A Friday ritual inspired by Amanda Soule & many others.

Please feel free to share a link to your own moment in the comments.

Next week, I'll be back here for realz. With more than just silly phone pictures of Roger and me. For now, just enjoy what I find to be semi-hilarious, semi-awesome pictures of us pretending to be models.

{This Moment}

2011-06-17T06:56:00.000-04:00

{This Moment}

A Friday ritual inspired by Amanda Soule & many others.

Please feel free to share a link to your own moment in the comments.

Gratituesday: Commuting

2011-06-14T22:51:00.000-04:00

http://www.flickr.com/photos/70945486@N00/2315927958

I have a long commute. Really long. It's nearly two hours each way, more or less, which means that I leave the house at around 6:30am and don't return until around 6:30pm, which leads to the feeling that my workday is about four hours longer than it actually is. To add insult to injury, I pay about $450 a month for the pleasure of commuting (AKA: driving a car that doesn't work in the snow to a parking spot that is way too tight to get on a train that is always packed to take a ten block walk breathing in air that smells like urine) for four hours a day. And today, June 14th, marks exactly one year that I've been doing it, every single weekday, in and out.

Okay. I hope that set the scene for you. Because here is the thing: I actually like it. Sure, there are problems with it (um, read above?), but overall, it's not so bad. I moved back up here knowing full well how long it takes to get to the city, and I did it anyway. Living up here, having the wherewithal to write and make decisions and be a normal, productive person outside of work, has been 100% worth it, and I wouldn't change the past year for anything. I know now what my parents and thousands of MetroNorth patrons before me knew: having access to both a great job in an amazing city with unlimited cultural offerings and the ability to live in a quiet area with nice people and deer & turkeys in the backyard, well, that makes the whole long commute thing worth it.

It's also more than just that. The commute itself isn't so bad. Even though it takes about twice as long as my commute from Brooklyn did, it is a million times more pleasant. I drive my (amazingly cool convertible) car to the station, and then sit down for a full 54 minutes, free to read, write, knit or fiddle with my phone as I please. I've posted thousands of twitter updates, read dozens of books, and finished knitting one entire sweater on that train. I know a lot of busy people read this blog, so they can understand when I say that this time is absolutely vital to my sanity. I'm good at time management, and so it's nice to have the extra time if I'm really pressed for an article or need to get some last-minute work done before the day starts, but really, it's the everyday quietude of the train that has become essential to my personal productivity and general happiness. Now that Roger commutes in with me most mornings, it's also a time for us to regroup, chat about our plans for the day or for life, and generally get reacquainted with each other. And then, of course, I come into the city through the greatest entrance on earth: Grand Central Station. Perfect.

Weekend Wanderings: Droid!

2011-06-13T06:44:00.001-04:00

Oh man, guys. I have not really raised my productivity level recently, but I have been exhausted to the max. I would not be surprised if this is another 2-post week, so apologies in advance. I think it's all the running that's tiring me out. Uh huh.* Friday, I nearly made my 15-mile a week goal (got to 14, but also walked 3 miles, so that must count for something) on an afternoon run with Dave. We went out with Cece to see Super 8 that evening, and it was really great. I almost never see movies, and even less often see movies in theatres, so I'm always a little taken in by them, but I just felt surrounded by this one. Cece thought it was a little too scary, but I found it to be charming with just the right amount of edge. Plus, J.J. Abrams directed it. Sarah Lawrence love!

Saturday, partially because I didn't eat much of anything on Friday, I awoke to discover I'd lost five pounds since the race. I've said before that I don't love counting pounds and calories and miles, but it's always nice to not feel bad about a number on a scale. Roger, Dave and I went to the farmer's market to get some vegetables, and then met up with my parents to buy a new cell phone. I decided on the Droid Charge, which I love wholly and completely. There are only two things I miss about my Blackberry: 1. BBMing (and, subsequently, knowing exactly when Roger has read a text message from me) and 2. A real keyboard. It's important for me to figure out how to use a touch-screen, because it's the way of the future, and all the nice things about the phone (an 8-megapixel camera! g-chat capabilities! angry birds!) more than make up for it. I am genuinely excited for all the possibilities for microblogging on the train, especially south of Tarrytown, where I get 4G access. That evening, we met Cece to get Thai food for dinner, and I took this pretty terrible photo:

Droid!

Sunday began well enough, with a 3.5 mile run, but quickly descended into crankiness about ... everything. Just one of those days. I had my nails done, did some yoga, ate some Chinese, and tried generally to make it better, but overall, by 10pm, it was time for an episode of M*A*S*H and some sleep. And so it was.

Droid!

*I guess all the blogs on my reader intersect at me, so of course there will be similarities, but lately it's been uncanny. I've been so amazed at how many people (namely APWers) have recently started running. Go all of us! Also, how many people are 22-24 weeks pregnant. Go them!

{This Moment}

2011-06-10T06:50:00.000-04:00

{This Moment}

A Friday ritual inspired by Amanda Soule & many others.

Please feel free to share a link to your own moment in the comments.

Life List Accomplished: Run in a Race

2011-06-06T15:33:00.000-04:00

Sorry for the lack of posting all of last week. I was sort of half-busy with barbecues and the long weekend, but mostly I was just existing. Anyway, at least we can start off this week with an accomplishment from my latest weekend wanderings!

Pre-Race Excitement!

I ran in a race on Saturday.

I don't really know how it happened, except that Shelby told me I should, and then showed me how to run without wanting to die (the secret? Run really, really slowly.), and then all of a sudden, I found myself in Buca di Beppo, carbo-loading with Shelby and April the day before running in the Freihofer's 33rd Annual Run for Women. This was a terrible idea, because I'd already had a too-big lunch at Chat n' Chew with Michelle from Indiana on her first trip to New York. Here is a running tip for you: don't eat too much the day before. You will not feel good. But, I really enjoyed my meals with all the great ladies, so I don't totally regret it.

More than 4000 women ran in the race

When I woke up on Saturday, I knew I'd made a mistake eating so much, and I was still gross and full-feeling. I figured I had three more hours before the race to feel a little better, and it did help as I waited with Shelby, along with her mother and boyfriend, for the race to begin. The organization was great: it was so easy to get our bibs and to my joy, we arrived in time to receive a free t-shirt, plus Freihofer's cookies and bread. We had some free health tests done (not surprisingly, I was a little heavier than normal, but everything seemed to be in fairly good working order), and walked around for a bit before lining up with our friends April and Maritza.

Team SMAK

It was a great feeling of anticipation as we moved slowly to the start line. The announcer had first-timers (like myself) cheer, then people who had already run the race, and before I knew it, we were at the start line, and running up what I believed was our only hill of the race. (Kristin's Running Tip #2 - look over the race route before you do it.) I knew that we would start with a race, and then thought that the route would flatten out in the park, before heading into a decline to the finish line. Not quite true - there were a few other hills in the park, also. So, I pushed full-throttle up the hill, staying with April and Shelby the whole way to the park. Once I hit the second hill in the park, I got a side stitch (the bane of my very short running career to this point), and at about 1.5 miles, I headed over to the side to walk it off for a minute or two, losing Shelby in the process. After working it out a little bit, I went on running, and made it to the finish without stopping again, coming in at 33 minutes, 5 seconds, which put me at 269 of 470 in my age group. We celebrated by wearing our matching race shirts to Dinosaur BBQ, which was amazing and delicious as always.

Shelby's Cheerleaders: Mike & Linsey

I'd be lying if I said I wasn't a little disappointed with my time. During training (admittedly on flatter ground), I'd been running at just about that time, and I was hoping that the energy from the race would let me get down to 30 minutes. Still, I wasn't counting on those hills, or eating enough to give myself a side stitch, so with those two things combined, I'm pretty impressed at the time. And, the overall experience was just amazing. I'm really hooked on running now, which is something I never, ever in my wildest dreams thought would be true. I hated (HATED!) running when I was younger, and even when I started to get more into fitness in college, running was never my favorite activity. Now, though, it's so easy, and I've really enjoyed getting outside more often.

Victorious!

Plus, the race experience was such fun. I'm hoping to do another race, this time an 8-mile run around our town lake, on July 4th. I'm not sure if that's going to be too much running for me in too-short a time, so I'm just going to train with that in mind, and if it works out, awesome, but I'm not going to hurt myself to make it. I'm also planning to stop eating out so often (since I really think that was part of my undoing in this race, and just in my health goals in general), and amp up the vegetables a little. I'll keep you posted with my progress!

{This Moment}

2011-05-27T09:19:00.000-04:00

{This Moment}

A Friday ritual inspired by Amanda Soule & many others.

Please feel free to share a link to your own moment in the comments.

Life List Accomplished: Camp Outdoors

2011-05-26T06:37:00.004-04:00

Outside Portland, ME - 2010

For most of my life, I'd camped in my living room. And I don't mean "set up a pillow fort." I mean "convinced my parents to bring down their three-person Coleman tent from the attic and set it up in our living room." This was really my favorite type of camping. By age 24, I had camped in various backyards (including once after Roger's prom), and once on our local lake when I was 12. Generally, it wasn't my favorite activity, and I woke up freezing and damp and ready to go home.

So, what made me decide that I wanted to "camp outdoors"? I really have no idea, except that I've always sort of wanted to cultivate the outdoorsy aspect of myself (have I mentioned how much I love L.L. Bean? No? Okay, that's an entry for another time.). Still, that desire to cultivate myself was powerful, and I found myself planning a trip to Maine, to go camping. I learned how to pitch a tent, and brushed up on my expert firemaking skills (one of two or three hard-skills I have), and packed up the car with the tent, sleeping bag, and bikes. Was the trip awesome? Yes. Would I recommend going to Maine? Um, yes, or anywhere else in New England, for that matter. Did I love camping? Um, no. Not so much.

It rained almost the entire time we camped, and since we were always at campsites and not just pulled off from a trail, I sort of felt like it didn't really count as "camping outdoors" to me. My favorite camp site, in Bar Harbor, was platform camping, and that was awesome, but for the most part, I wasn't in love. Plus, we'd decided to go camping in part to try out the great outdoors, but mostly to save money. And when my credit card bill came back, it turns out we really hadn't save tons and tons of money. Sure, this was mostly due to the fact that we ate lobster every day, but wasn't camping supposed to offset that? We tried again in Vermont later that summer, and while it didn't rain, it also felt like "not quite outdoors" to me.

So, yep, I crossed it off, because who knows where my camping travels will take me, but they began this way. Now, a question for all of you real outdoorsy people: How do you camp without a site? It's not the finding a spot and pitching a tent and sleeping that I worry about - it's the police. Are you allowed to just pull off the side of the trail in a national park, or the Appalachian Trail, or the Adirondacks and set up shop? Is this legal? Is it safe? Are you more likely to be eaten by bears or Deliverance-style backwoods-crazies this way? Regular camping tips are also appreciated, but mainly, I just want to avoid being arrested/eaten if I decide to spend a night in Fahnestock or Bear Mountain.

Worlds of Wonder: Walt Disney World Marathon

2011-05-25T22:01:00.001-04:00

So, after two days of not-running-no-not-even-a-little-you-can't-make-me, I started walking on my treadmill and complaining to Shelby, my cyber-running buddy and BFFL, that I hadn't run in two days and couldn't bring myself to do more than walk on a 7% incline today. I whined that I've been getting home too late, leaving too early, and just generally didn't want to be running. I didn't tell her, but I'd also eaten a really large portion of instant pistachio pudding by myself. There was a lot of guilt, and some worry that I wouldn't be ready for our 5k in two weeks. So, she kept texting me, and finally I just felt so bad that she was so encouraging and I wasn't doing anything, that I ran for a mile just to get it over with. About half-way through, I felt so good that I thought I could do another mile. I didn't (hey, no one's perfect), but I was really, really glad to have gotten back on the horse. Or, the treadmill, as it may be. I was really gross and sweaty (man, it got hot really quickly here!), and I texted Shelby that I smelled. She said, "It's the smell of success." And so it was.

So, I've been thinking a lot about running lately, clearly, and building up and enjoying my quiet time outdoors and generally loving it. Naturally, I've been thinking about marathons, because doing one seems to be the holy grail for runners, or at least many of the runners I know. I'm not sure if I want to run one, because it seems sort of scary and not necessarily the reason why I run. I like the quiet of running alone, and I like not going very far. And if I did run one, I guess it would probably be the New York Marathon because, um, my whole life seems to revolve around this one little patch of dirt. But, in an ideal world where I want to run a marathon, I think the one I would pick is the Walt Disney World Marathon, which just sounds like a ton of fun. I'm a little hush-hush about my love of Disney World (because I am dating someone who thinks it is for capitalist neo-colonialists and because I have a lot of friends who think it is lame), but I have many, many very happy memories from trips there when I was younger, and since Shelby is vocal about her love for it, and since they have an awesome marathon, I figured I'd devote an entry to it now:

http://www.flickr.com/photos/21394882@N00/5371378102

In short, it seems like fun. The loop runs through all four parks, and there's entertainment along the way. At the end, you get a Mickey Mouse medal. Sounds good to me! (Okay, okay, I know that's too short, but I'm tired, and pretty sure I'm never going to run a marathon. If you think you might, though you can find out more information on the WDW Marathon website.)

Do any of you want to run a marathon? I know a few readers already have. What made you all decide to go for it?

Weekend Wanderings: Running

2011-05-24T21:51:00.000-04:00

Guys, I had such a productive weekend! I think that productivity may have led to a complete shutdown this week, though, so sorry for the delays, gaps, generally MTA-like service you'll be getting here this week. But, the weekend has proven, I think, that when I don't have any real plans, I can get a whole lot done. This includes:

Friday night date night at one of our favorite Italian places, Little Sorrento. Everything is good there, especially the bread and asparagus ravioli, and they just happened to clear out a birthday party of about 15 nine-year-old boys as we walked in. Plus, we got to eavesdrop some on a few girls who are apartment searching, and feel glad that it isn't only us. Score!
A 2.5 mile run/1.5 mile walk with Cece on Saturday morning, followed by a really refreshing smoothie. (Smoothie Recipe One: 1/2 cucumber, some water, some ice, 2 tbsp honey. Blend together.) I wish I could start every morning that way!
Planting the vegetable garden out back during the one sunny day of last week. Even though much of it most likely won't be fully grown until after we leave, it was great to plant, and I'm looking forward to any zucchini, strawberries, tomatoes, green beans, cucumbers, and squash that do make their way into the kitchen.
A massive amount of C&R posts ready to go. I lost some steam, but about half of what I would normally post in June is already written and set to autopost. This makes me so happy, and also lifts a bit of a weight off my shoulder, since there's lots of other writing I should be doing (like, say, articles and papers and scholarship applications).
A 2 mile run alone on Sunday morning. I love feeling that I'm getting stronger and faster, and I genuinely enjoy running now.* I can't wait for our race on June 4th!
Make my first Green Monster! (Smoothie Recipe Two: 1 banana, 2 cups of spinach, 1/2 cup of milk, 4 tbsp of wheat germ. Blend together.)
Brunch with Rachel, who is back in town for some of the summer. I had an amazing time last summer with lots of friends who were visiting, and while I doubt that will be replicated, it reminded me that there are lots of things to enjoy in the near future!
Cleaning up my guest room for Dave's move-in next Wednesday. This doesn't sound totally impressive, but it really, really is. The backroom is really a giant storage closet, so clearing it out meant clearing out my real closet to fit things from the room into it, then moving all those things (including, but not limited to, 13 cases of hardwood flooring), then reorganizing and cleaning the bookshelf in there so Dave has space for his own books (he's taking Greek at CUNY this summer, hence the living at my house), then cleaning all the floors and furniture, clearing out the dresser, and washing all the bedding. And now, running the dehumidifier for a week.

Some things, of course, didn't get done, but really, for a weekend where I expected the most I would accomplish was "eat dinner at a restaurant on Friday," this was awesome. Hopefully the rest of the week turns around to follow suit and get a little more active!

*I really truly do love running now, something I thought I'd never say, but I got home at 8pm last night and tonight, and don't want to run outside in the dark. The normal thing to do would be to run on the treadmill that is in my bedroom, but, and I kid you not, I'm sitting here in my workout clothes, too afraid to try it out. It isn't the treadmill, it's the window it sits right next to, and the dark unknown beyond it. I am afraid of the dark. I am also reading a Stephen King novel. Just so y'all know. Full disclosure. **
**Oh, wait, Roger just walked in. I may run without fear after all!

Worlds of Wonder: Summer Weekend Trips

2011-05-18T22:48:00.002-04:00

http://www.flickr.com/photos/77482236@N00/369387948

One of the many perks of working in publishing is Summer Fridays. I don't know if every single house does it, but all the ones I've worked for do, and the basic premise is that no one in publishing works on Fridays in the summer, so everyone leaves early from Memorial to Labor Day. Even though I graduated almost exactly three years ago, and worked every summer from the time I was 16 on, I still mourn the loss of true summers, the sort of eight-to-twelve week break that lasts forever, and Summer Fridays let me feel a little bit of that freedom all over again. Our first one is next week, and I'm ready for it - I even bought heart-shaped sunglasses in preparation for the first beach day. Sometimes, I just head home right away and bask in a long afternoon, but mostly I am a compulsive planner, and try to fit in as many day and weekend trips as humanly possible. This summer, the docket* looks a little like this:

Hartford, CT: If you haven't realized after nearly a year and a half of reading about our trips, Roger and I don't really agree on what we like to do on vacation. Luckily, Connecticut has something for each of us - a writer's house and an art museum. With both Mark Twain's House and the Wadsworth Atheneum, and only two hours away, this seems like it was made for us.
Charlestown, RI: My family used to rent a house here every summer, and some of my favorite memories take place on the beach and at restaurants in the area. There's not really anything here for Roger (who really doesn't like beaches, but does like lobster), but I believe he will come with me just because he loves me. Shelby says she will also come. Maybe we will camp on the beach! Or, spring for a fancy B&B!
Storm King Art Center: Roger loves art and bicycling; I love Andy Goldsworthy and being outside. I still can't believe we've never made it up here. This summer, we will.
Boston, Philadelphia, DC: Those fabulous, old-timey cities close by, where we have friends and where there is culture and fun to be had. We usually make it out to one of these places each summer, and Boston is next on our list. Any suggestions?
New York, NY: Often, I end up hanging out in the city on Fridays, finding new and interesting things to do, from eating hot dogs at Coney Island to seeing gorillas at the Bronx Zoo to finding a million festivals and concerts and openings. That's what the first summer weekend will look like - tea at Alice's Tea Cup with Shelby, and several barbecues at home. Sounds like a good start to me!

Do you have any summer plans yet? Do you feel a compulsive need to fit in as much as you can, or do you go with the flow?
*I just made this docket up in my head. Please don't hold me to it.

Gratituesday: Baseball

2011-05-17T23:38:00.001-04:00

Jill & Me on Sunday

Despite the fact that every member of my immediate family has lived in the Bronx at some point, I didn't grow up in a baseball-loving house. It happened when I was about fourteen. My sister fell in love with Derek Jeter, and my mother admitted she'd always loved the Yankees. To my completely-non-athletic self, it seemed to come from no where. All of a sudden, one day, the Yankees were on the TV. The next, my sister and my mother had an infinite supply of Yankees T-shirts. On the third day, they had seasons tickets, and two of my family members went to every single Sunday home game for about five years.

Roger & Me in 2009

It was rare that I was one of those two. Mostly, I was a sub, warming the bench (you know, our house) until my mother really, really couldn't find someone to go with her, or her boss gave her a set of four tickets and I was allowed to bring a friend. It happened about once a year, and I was mostly bored to tears. When they closed the old stadium, my parents were at the last game ever played there, and although they decided not to get seasons passes at the new stadium, they went to the first game ever played there, as well. When I went to my first game at the new stadium, I truly couldn't tell the difference from the old one, which had never looked very different from Shea Stadium to me, either. Heresy, I know, but that should give you some idea of how truly not into baseball I was. When Roger and I went to our first game together, we had killer seats, like $325-a-seat seats (thanks, mom's boss!), and it was still just a fun outing, and not much more. Even my love for Americana-kitsch couldn't get me to really enjoy a baseball game.

My father's self-portrait as a hot dog.

So, I'm not 100% sure what changed on Sunday, but I had such a wonderful time. It could be that my friend Kevin caught a foul ball a few days earlier and tweeted, "Boyhood dream come true." It could be that my coworkers are invested in the games (one was celebrating her two-year-anniversary at the game on Saturday, and two others use Yankees water cups everyday). It could even be that I am reading a Stephen King novel (coincidentally, for the first time since I was about 14) and he loves the Red Socks and we were playing them, and, um, who doesn't want to see the Yankees play the Red Socks? Yay tradition and team spirit and rivalry! I think what it really was, though, is that I put some effort into it. For the first time, I put on a pinstripe hat, I ate a hot dog, and I decided, This is the day I figure out when to cheer. And I did. Sure, I never quite got excited enough to stand up in my seat, but I instinctively clapped a few times, and knew who was getting points when, and just generally figured it out, and had an great time because of it.

I think this, then, is the life lesson the Yankees have taught me: Sometimes just showing up isn't enough - you have to be present, focused, energized. And also this: Baseball caps are really good for days when you don't have time to shower.

Weekend Wanderings: Sidecars

2011-05-16T21:24:00.000-04:00

Sidecars!

On Friday, my very good friend Alana became a doctor of jurisprudence, so we celebrated. Because nothing says law school graduate like sidecars and tapas, both of which were awesome. It was an excellent time of seeing people I don't see nearly enough (Sarah! Elka!), and drinking when I don't drink nearly enough. I think the highlight, other than Alana's totally excellent law school hat, was certainly how proud and excited her partner was. I congratulated her and said, "It's never just one person who goes through all of this," and she said, "It really isn't. This is the culmination of seven years of hard work. It's just amazing to be a part of it" and I though that was just about the nicest, truest thing I've ever heard. They're pretty amazing people, and I couldn't be happier for either of them. And then, WE TOOK A TAXI-CAB BACK TO GRAND CENTRAL! Awesome.

Alana graduated!

Saturday, of course, I nursed my hangover. Pretty much all day. Roger and I did some work at Starbucks, and then came home and made chocolate chip cookies for my parents and their double-dates. They stayed out later than I stayed awake. Also awesome, but in a different way.

Yankees Game

Sunday, no longer hungover, we went for an awesome brunch at Birdsall House with my sister and Cece. I really loved it (the free bloody Mary was the best one I've ever had. And also the second one I've ever had), but I'm not sure the other diners unanimously agreed. The biscuits Benedict were really delicious, but the mushroom omelet is awfully mushroomy. I know Birdsall isn't everyone's cup of tea, but I really enjoy it each time I go. We meandered over to the Bruised Apple, and while perusing, I found a signed copy of Bird by Bird, a book Leah recommended I read a long time ago, and at $6.50, I couldn't say no. The whole bookstore makes me want to sit down with a cup of tea and my typewriter. Coincidentally, we went back over to Cece's for a cup of tea, and made banana cream pie (homemade whipped cream! leftover warm pudding!). Her house also makes me want to sit down with a cup of tea and my typewriter. Lovely. After, my family and I headed down to the Bronx to see the Yankees play the Red Socks. I put a concerted effort into following the game, and those efforts were rewarded by a far more enjoyable game than I've ever seen. More on that tomorrow!

Gratituesday: Gift Registries

2011-05-10T23:17:00.001-04:00

This is not on my Amazon wish-list.

Once upon a time, I hated bridal showers. I thought they were a greedy ploy for presents, a retro-sexist party for furthering the gender divide, and, to top it all off, just really stupid, with their stupid hats made out of bows and paper plates. Oh my goodness. The dislike I felt for them was very strong. I don't feel this way anymore, and now, actually, I think they're pretty much the most wonderful thing ever: a group of women getting together to celebrate another woman and prepare her for a new part of her life. (Funny how my opinions change constantly, isn't it?) But, even back when I hated bridal showers, I still really loved gift registries.

For one thing, they're infinitely practical. When I moved to Brooklyn, I started one for my housewarming party. Did anyone buy anything off it? Of course not, because what 22-year-old brings a gift to a housewarming party? (To be fair, most of my friends actually did, which was very sweet and surprising! But they're all creative and got me lots of other wonderful things.) But, I still use it as a little bit of a shopping list for myself of things I think are awesome, and at holidays and birthdays, my Amazon wish-list is where my family goes to ensure they'll find something I'll like. (They say I'm picky. I say I know what I like.) If anyone asks, "Kristin, what would you like for Christmas?" it's remarkably easy for me to say, "Why, anything on my amazon list that fits your price point. Thank you for asking, Roger/mom/Roger'smom/friend/strangerontheinternet." I love it.

Secondly, it makes shopping so easy, and I seriously wish people would start using registries and wish-lists for more than just major life changes, because they come in big-handy at less major life changes like birthdays and Tuesdays. My best friend has has one for ages, and I use it all the time. I don't think of it as impersonal, because I'm still deciding which item I want her to have, and because when I happen to see something not on the list that screams Shelby!, I still get it for her. For people you don't know so well, it makes it even easier, knowing that you don't have to resort to cash or risk forcing your nine-months-pregnant cousin to go return a ton of boppy pillows that weren't the right color. (Also - registries teach me things. For example, I had no idea what a boppy pillow even was, until I looked on my cousin's registry and bought her one. Turns out, they are one of the many, many things a new mother needs to ensure proper breastfeeding. Yes, sometimes I learn things I wasn't quite ready for, also.)

Don't do a google image search for "Tiffany Holiday," folks.

And finally, it's sort of creepy, and I'm almost afraid to admit it, but I really enjoy looking at what other people want. And not just people for whom I am buying presents - everyone. Friends from elementary school, acquaintances I've met at a handful of parties, even friends-of-friends. (Eeek! I know! I'm sorry I'm so creepy!) I don't really believe it gives deep insight into their souls, and I don't really draw any personal inspiration from it (except for the time I saw these awesome glasses on a former roommate's wedding registry - they are just too gorgeous). But, since putting together my own home, it's been fascinating to me to see what other people feel they need to build theirs. And while I don't think material objects can tell the entire story of who you are a person or a couple or a family, I do think they offer a certain insight into a personality. Sure, most of the things on a registry are the same across the board, but it's the differences - a specialty item here, a unique take on a usual item there - that I find so appealing.

I've even been tempted, really and truly tempted, to buy gifts for people off their registries when I barely know them. There's just something about giving gifts that I've always loved,* and somehow, this really plays into that. So, this whole entry is in part to tell you that registries are the greatest thing known to mankind,** but really also to ask: How creeped out would you be if I bought you something on your registry or wish-list? More importantly, what item are you wishing for that really sums up who you are as a person?

*I'm too embarrassed to post it here, but while cleaning out some papers, I discovered a gift list I created when I was in 6th grade, listing all my friends, the gifts I wanted to get them for the holidays, and their price point. Now, I literally have the same thing set up in Amazon with suggestions from friends' lists.
** Okay, I know there are plenty of things that can go wrong with registries - selfishness, lack of creativity, being rude, etc. - but overall, I just think they're really nice.

Weekend Wanderings: Oxford Reunion

2011-05-09T23:05:00.000-04:00

Hudson River (note dark spot on camera - fail)

Roger and I spent most of last week planning a trip to 5 Napkin Burger. First, we were going on Thursday, then we were going on Friday, and finally, we were going on Saturday. I think you know where I'm going. No 5 Napkin Burger for us. I knew the weekend was in real trouble when Friday night consisted of Roger and I almost finishing an entire pizza by ourselves (doesn't fresh mozzarella mean it's healthy?) and me trying to run while I was really, really sore and still full (I made it, not joking, three minutes and forty-four seconds). Thank goodness Saturday had bigger plans.

Good sports!

After doing an interview with a really friendly writer, I headed into the city to meet up with Karen, the program administrator from my days back in England. She'd visited New York right after I graduated, and I was lucky enough to meet up with her then, but this is the first time in three years I've seen her, so that was wonderful. Other friends from Oxford were there, most of whom I hadn't seen since April of last year or longer, along with Cece and Rob, who are awesome and always up for anything. We went to the Ninth Ward, which was pretty ideal for a Saturday afternoon. They had BOGO drinks until 6pm, plenty of space in the back, with a fountain, and pretty good food. I would definitely go back for another happy hour there. My friend Aaron, who loved bacon when we met, recently became a vegetarian, so we talked about that for a while (and he disapproved, of course, of my plan to "get back to it one day"), and there was plenty of discussion about where in Queens Roger and I should move with Tess and Esther, both of whom moved there about a year ago. Our group thinned out over the course of the afternoon, and the last of us finished the night off with drinks at Black & White, a bar that NYMag seems to think is way better than I did.

Some of the SLC Oxonians

Sunday was a low-key day of "getting it done," with some C&R work, some yardwork, some pizza-making (whole wheat crust with ricotta, broccoli, onions, and artichoke hearts, and white crust with chicken, bacon and ranch),* and a short run that I managed to convince Roger to come on with me. Roger has always been much better at running than me, and so I was pretty impressed with the fact that I could not only keep up with him, but I actually kept going for a tiny bit when he started walking. Yes, I'm gloating. No, don't tell Roger I told you. He might stop coming with me, and I find it really hard to motivate myself without a buddy. Roger just read this over my shoulder said, "I'm not your buddy!" Sigh.

Karen & Tess

And, today, I met the wonderful Mary and Becky for happy hour at the Silverleaf Tavern (quick review: way better than Black & White, with fun, cheap appetizers, but find out what their happy hour special drinks are - we didn't, and paid full-price for them - oh, and get there early for free wine in the lobby of the Klimpton hotel, one of the best parts of a great chain). Seeing the two of them was wonderful, even if I was made fun of mercilessly at dinner for it yesterday. Roger, of course, sent me text messages like, "Are you alive?" and, ten minutes later, after I didn't respond, "Oh god! Have they kidnapped you?!" But really, it was just nice to sit down with two new, interesting people, who are both really smart and kind. So, that's my stance on meeting APW ladies. They're all awesome, and I'm hopeful that Mary will get that job she's interviewing for, so that we can make this a monthly event.

*I feel this is a good place to tell you that my mother's Mothers' Day celebration was her very own steak, with grilled squash and Junior's cheesecake. Oh, and a Nook Color.

{This Moment}

2011-05-06T08:47:00.000-04:00

{This Moment}

A Friday ritual inspired by Amanda Soule & many others.

Please feel free to share a link to your own moment in the comments.

Gratituesday: Emotion

2011-05-03T23:01:00.000-04:00

I'm not really sure how to write about how I'm feeling right now, but reading Lizzie's words this morning made think that I need to say something. She was brave, so I'm trying to be brave, so please try not to judge me on this one. It's difficult for me because I'm not really sure how I'm supposed to feel, which is making it nearly impossible for me to gauge how I actually feel. Roger woke me up on Sunday night to tell me that Osama Bin Laden had been killed, and he tells me I responded with "completely indifference" before falling back asleep approximately thirty seconds later. I'm far from completely indifferent about his death, but I don't feel like celebrating and I don't feel like mourning. All I felt on Monday morning, after the news really set in, after I saw a policeman hugging a woman in a hajib headscarf, after I read messages from friends across the internet, was sad.

September 11th is something about which I've always felt sad, and worse still, like I had no right to that sadness. The only real claim I have on grief there is that we were all supposed to go there on a field trip that day, to an arts college fair. That when I called my grandmother to see if my parents were alright (my mother worked in a hospital in the Bronx and my father was director of programming for the FDNY, and the phone lines were down all over the place), she cried and I hung up on her and also cried, and then spent the night at my best friend's house to avoid being home. That we talked about it all the time for the rest of the year, using it in lesson plans and at party conversations, until we didn't anymore.

And that's sort of where it happened for me, the moment where we didn't anymore. It wasn't that I got over it. But I read an article from one of the children whose parent died in the Challenger disaster, an open letter to all the children who lost parents on September 11th, talking about how a national tragedy ceases to be a personal one, and to stop watching the images that were taking away all of our breaths. It wasn't my tragedy, it really and truly wasn't, except in the way that it was everybody's tragedy, and I think I've been trying to let it go it ever since, but have mostly just been suppressing it. I stopped watching news casts about it, didn't see the movie when it came out, and stopped measuring my life and the progression of time by the date.

I don't think of my fear of heights as stemming from that day, and I don't think of the way I view our wars or our flag or how I feel getting on a plane or walking down Madison Avenue to work as part of it, either. I've certainly never, ever visited ground zero, and I didn't dance there on Sunday. But I don't disapprove of the people who did, even a little. And not being in either of those camps leaves me feeling as much on the outside of it as I ever did, with no right to grief or the sadness or, yes, the terror, I was feeling on that day. So while I wish I could say that all I'm feeling is grateful for my life, or my freedom, or the sacrifices others have made so I can have both, it's not only that. I'm feeling grateful, but also like something unidentifiable and unwanted has opened up inside me, and I'm unsure of how to close it again.

Weekend Wanderings: Home Improvements

2011-05-02T07:23:00.002-04:00

Today is the day - the much awaited announcement of the winners of our giveaway! Congratulations to Sonia and Trisha! Both are awesome ladies, and I really hope they enjoy their books. My lovely friend Liz also commented, and I actually have a book that I think would be just perfect for her, so it turns out that everyone is a little bit of a winner here, and I love that. Thanks again to Meghan for getting the whole thing started!

This weekend went by slowly, which was wonderful after several weeks where I felt I couldn't catch my breath. Friday night I made chicken taquitos (from Annie's Eats) and four-layer dip (from my mother's limited potluck recipe knowledge) and enjoyed margaritas out of a bucket with Shelby and Cece. It was a poor excuse for really good Mexican food, but was a great evening regardless, and those bucket-margaritas were awesome!

We ended the evening a little early, because Shelby and I decided to go running at 7am on Saturday morning. We're training for a 5k in Albany in June, and this was my first run for it, and our first ever run together. We met up with Lauren and the three of us ran four reps of 5-minute running and 3-minute walking intervals, followed by a long walk back. All total, we covered four miles, and it felt great. We went our separate ways, and I spent the day in and out of bathroom showrooms with my parents, who are re-doing their 1950s-era pink-and-blue-tiled monstrosity sometime in the near future. Not exactly a riveting afternoon, but I probably know more about steam showers and jets than you do. Plus, there were clawfoot tubs. That evening, Roger and I headed to the opening of Art in Cameroon: Sculptural Dialogues at the Neuberger Museum. I've been to Purchase many times, but this was the first time I'd been in the museum, so it was a nice change of pace.

Saturday was filled with even more home improvements. Once I finished putting together my pages on Call & Response (secret: our next print issue is coming out this week!), I did the tiniest bit of yardwork imaginable and got a ridiculously bad sunburn for only being in the sun for a few hours. For lunch, I made a killer guacamole (I decided it would be overkill to have it on Friday, but was craving avocado), and ran two miles on the treadmill. The rest of the evening was restful and productive, as I started to tie up loose ends and get my house into order again. No pictures this weekend, but try to imagine sun, flowers, and warm-ish weather, along with smiles (and bathroom supplies)!

{This Moment}

2011-04-29T08:41:00.001-04:00

{This Moment}

A Friday ritual inspired by Amanda Soule & many others.

Please feel free to share a link to your own moment in the comments.

If you haven't already done so, go ahead and enter my giveaway!

Today's your last chance, and your odds are good.

Gratituesday: Books

2011-04-26T21:38:00.002-04:00

You may not know this, but I really like reading. I like reading blogs, I like reading newspapers, I like reading my Nook. But, more than anything, I like reading books. Reading books is, more likely than not, the reason I decided to be a writer. I remember the first book I memorized and "read" outloud to my kindergarten class, Good Night, Moon (for the reason I didn't get a PhD, see this hilarious/terrifying McSweeney's piece), and I remember the first book I wrote, a treatise on feeding Shamoo when I was six. Though I don't read as much print as I'd like to, I can appreciate the book as an object, and I love all sorts of notebooks, papers, covers, and literary ephemera, and the act of sitting in a comfortable chair with a book in hand is second-to-none. I could seriously go on about them so long that you would probably stop reading, but I love them, and hopefully I'll write more about that in the near future.

In the meantime, I should say that although I don't read many book blogs, I did recently win a book giveaway on We Ski Slow, which was exceedingly exciting. And by exceedingly exciting, I mean I actually did a little dance in my chair when I read the email. (I would say that I never win anything, but that's a lie. Once, when I was eight, I won a banana stuffed animal at our Fireman's Fair. Another time, at our sixth grade canteen, I won an inflatable chair. Both were awesome.) I finished the book, I Was Amelia Earhart a few days ago, and I want to pass my good luck on to one of my awesome readers. I didn't fall in love with the book, but I can't quite pinpoint why, since I've loved Amelia Earhart forever, I'm interested in reclamations of historical events, the language was lush and I was intrigued by the narrative style, which changes points-of-view at seemingly random intervals. That's a lot of reasons to like a book, but this just didn't quite hit the spot for me, so if you win the book, I'd love to get your thoughts on it. So, one lucky commenter will get a copy of this book. But wait, there's more!

A second lucky commenter will get a copy of The Moon is Down, by one of my favorite authors of all time, John Steinbeck. (Another reason I didn't get a PhD is that all of the people I want to study are American men writing from 1920-1950. In case you haven't heard, there's a surplus of us. PS - My backup plan was Virginia Woolf. Seriously.) I've actually never read The Moon is Down, but since I've loved everything I've read by Steinbeck, I suspect this will be awesome as well. We can read it together, if you want, winning-commenter, and create a one-time book club of two. Or you can win it and never speak to me again. That's cool too.

So, if you've made it this far, you must really want one of these books! Luckily, I have an average of about 2 comments on each entry, so the numbers should be in your favor. Since Meghan created such a great list of beach reads, I won't ask you to comment with your favorite book or suggestion for a good summer novel. You can if you want, but what I'd really like to know is your favorite place to read, or a particular spot that is forever tied to a book or reading in your mind. If you have a preference for which book you'd like, feel free to mention that also. I'll keep comments open for the rest of the week, and announce the winner on Saturday morning (or Monday, if I'm particularly lazy).

And just in case you were wondering, my favorite place to read is my ratty armchair under a bright light next to my bookshelf. My literary linked place is Spain, which is imprinted on my mind as a burnished copy of Cat's Eye in glaring sun and 115 degree heat, on the beach, listening to Tori Amos and more passionately in love with Roger than I'd ever been with another person in my life.

Weekend Wanderings: Easter

2011-04-25T20:36:00.001-04:00

I'm not a big celebrant of Easter, folks, but I had a nice one this year anyway. My father's 59th birthday was on Thursday, and since my sister had class that evening, my whole family celebrated on Friday by visiting a new local barbecue place, 151 Grill. It was a bit of a mixed bag: the ribs, burnt ends, mashed potatoes, and corn bread were amazing, but the macaroni & cheese, the fried chicken, and the corn fritters weren't as good as they could have been (admittedly, the breading on the fried chicken was some of the best I've ever had, but the skin was so fatty I couldn't bring myself to eat it). I'd go back, but only for certain items. I think my father enjoyed his birthday, although there weren't any gifts, because he's waiting to buy himself a new camera. We Maffeis are nothing if not practical.

When I awoke on Saturday morning, it was pouring, so I canceled my plans to run and go to the farmer's market, and ran a few errands instead. When we got back home, I made Easter bread for no real reason other than I seem to like making bread, and I didn't want to do the work I'd brought home. Then, Roger, my mother, and I proceeded to watch no less than four hours of Will & Kate specials, including the Lifetime movie. Stop judging me. The bread turned out really well, and I now know way more about royal weddings than I ever needed to.

Sunday, we had a lovely brunch with Roger's family for Easter and his mother's birthday. The rest of the day was spent working, with a brief pause to watch The Queen, which made me realize that I absolutely, positively, cannot live without these glasses. I would defend myself against accusations that I am watching way, way too much royal-themed things lately, but if I am being honest, I am at this very moment watching The King's Speech, so I acknowledge I may have a problem. That problem may or may not be "really, really missing Oxford." So, there you have it. A very quiet, very enjoyable, Easter weekend.

{This Moment}

2011-04-22T07:14:00.003-04:00

{This Moment}

A Friday ritual inspired by Amanda Soule & many others.

Please feel free to share a link to your own moment in the comments.

nkyin kyin: ALA Conference in Ohio

2011-04-21T22:07:00.000-04:00

Saturday, April 16, 2011 - Columbus, OH

Dan & Allison at Home

When we woke up on Saturday, it was pouring, and we'd missed the free breakfast at the hotel. (Luckily, I still had some leftover pizza, so I was much less cranky about the lack of breakfast than Roger was!) We packed up our backpacks (Roger's birthday gift from me was a new one, which he admits is more comfortable than his 10-year-old Jansport), and headed out into the rain. Once we finally managed to get out of Athens, the drive went smoothly, and eventually the deluge subsided, breaking into warm sun at one point before turning gray again just as we wandered into Columbus. We were early, and hadn't gotten a hostess gift yet, so we drove around the city for a bit, and searched out a bottle of Maker's Mark for Allison and Dan, who kindly let us stay with them on Saturday night.

This is how adults live.

When we arrived on their doorstep, we found that, not for the first time, we'd forced Dan to come home early from the gym to let us in. He brought us on a tour of their enormous apartment, which happens to be the second floor of a former convent. Dan promised us it was haunted, but we didn't see any ghosts while we were there. I don't think I've ever been in an apartment so large belonging to anyone under the age of 35, so the whole thing - from the full-size dining room table to the bookshelves to the (oh my god) separate offices for each of them - was incredibly impressive to me, and placed our good friends quite specifically in the world of Adults (as if they weren't already there...). After dropping off our things and taking the house tour, Dan drove us on to campus to meet Allison, who was attending a conference of her own.

Goodale Park

After heading back to the apartment to drop off the car and let Dan shower, the four of us walked through Goodale Park, where pink trees were blooming over adorable couples and dogs ran free on the grass, to the North Market, a big covered market with a variety of vendors, for lunch. Roger had the biggest samosa I have ever seen, and I had a large and delicious bowl of pho. We walked up High Street and window-shopped at what looked like some great stores. We're all broke, so we only stopped in one place, Funky & Functional, this really amazing antique and vintage shop. It seems that the Midwest is the place to be for awesome pre-owned goods! They had some really amazing things, including a set of china that looked like a more ornate version of the china I inherited from my grandmother, and a display bowl and candle-holder set that looked exactly like a display bowl I inherited from my grandmother. Basically, the entire store looked like my grandmother's house must have in the 60s, and, um, that's amazing. I wanted to buy the candle-holders, but they couldn't be sold without the bowl, so I left empty-handed.

North Market

We wandered a little longer, and walked back to the Allison and Dan's place once the neighborhood started to fall off. We stopped for beer and I bought a six pack of Columbus Brewing Co.'s IPA. I wasn't a big fan of it, but it's always nice to try something different. The four of us hung out for a while at the apartment, catching up. We hadn't seen each other since Christmas, and most likely won't see each other again until the summer, so it was great to be able to sit down and talk for a while. Between her first year at grad school and my life suddenly getting busy this year, Allison and I don't speak anywhere near as much as we used to, but I still consider her a very dear friend, and I was so happy to hear about how well she's doing at OSU and in Columbus. She and Dan (and their two cats - Weezy and Leo) seem so happy there!

The Burgundy Room

After voting on a place to eat, we headed to the Burgundy Room for a really great meal. This wine bar has a nice selection of "tapas," which are more or less traditional appetizers, kicked up a notch and made with local ingredients. The food was really good, and the prices were amazing. For $27 each (including tip), we shared: a pitcher of sangria big enough to give us each three water-glassfuls, truffle oil fries, wild boar corndogs with molasses ketchup, super-flavorful pork sliders, crab cake with poached egg, shrimp & grits, and steamed mussels. It was the perfect amount of food and wine, and we followed it up with Jeni's Splendid Ice Cream, which really lived up to its name. Aside from having really incredible flavors I've never considered (I had olive oil with sea-salt pepitas and Savannah buttermint - to die for - and Roger had a spicy Bangkok peanut and corn-syrup custard with whiskey and pecans), the man behind the counter was incredible. Not only did he explain each flavor the way you might at a wine tasting, when he heard we were from New York, he told us the exact location of the Dean & Deluca in Manhattan that carries their pints. I am a real sucker for knowledgeable customer service, but really? That guy is fantastic.

Jeni's Splendid Ice Cream

We ended our evening with more chatting, and a viewing of the incredible documentary, Wolverine: Chasing the Phantom. Who would have thought wolverines were so awesome? We headed to sleep right after the movie (and, okay, I fell asleep during the movie, because apparently I am 85-years-old) and saying goodbye, since we had to leave at 7am the next morning (because Allison and Dan are not 85-years-old and awake at 7am on Sundays). The drive home was mostly uneventful, except for a good breakfast we had on the road at Panera and getting stuck waiting to get on the GWB for 45-minutes (about as shocking as the fact that it rained for some of the way home). Overall, the trip to Ohio was a really nice one. I think Roger and I have agreed that we won't be doing any more conferences in the Midwest for at least a few months (two within three weeks of each other felt like a lot), but the ALA was really interesting, seeing Roger speak was amazing, and we're so grateful to Allison & Dan for opening their home to us.

nkyin kyin: ALA Conference in Ohio

2011-04-20T17:31:00.001-04:00

Friday, April 15, 2011 - Athens, OH

Friday, our last day in Athens, was filled with ever more panels: New Trajectories in South African Literature, Black Channels: Historiography, Art, and the Black Diaspora, and Publishing Africa, my final panel. The publishing panel was the only one I felt really qualified to be at (well, other than the poetry one from Thursday, and that was just a reading), and I was a little disappointed to find that it was a panel on how to get one's book published, rather than on the nuances of publishing Africans and scholarship on Africa. Either way, it was nice to end the conference on a note of full comprehension, and on a slower day. In between the panels, Roger and I spent a lot of time lounging around outside, where the weather was warm and sunny and beautiful. It feels like it's been a long winter in New York, and so it was lovely to be outside without a coat, even if only in between conferences.

Sunny, sunny Ohio University

We skipped the evening keynote and reception to hang out and enjoy our "vacation" a little, without any more intellectual stimulation. Roger told one of his former professors during the conference, "I used to think everyone was being a little silly complaining about how hard conferences are, but they're more tiring than they sound." I couldn't agree more. We bought two small pies at Avalanche Pizza, which we ate back at the hotel in a move that reminded me a lot of vacations with my family when we were younger. There's just something really decadent about eating in a hotel room. Especially, I guess, when each person has a pizza to themselves. My pizza, the Chicken Chubacabra (chicken, bacon, artichoke hearts, and cheddar), was really good, but a little much by the end of the second slice. It did make me really keen to make my own bacon-and-artichoke-hearts pie sometime soon, though.

After two and a half days of lovely weather, the rain we'd outrun on our way out of New York finally made it to Ohio, and as we watched countless episodes of That 70s Show on netflix (oh, Roger, why must you draw me in to your terrible tv-watching habits!), it poured and poured outside, proof that if I need to drive for more than 45 minutes, it will rain for at least part of that drive. That, however, is a story for tomorrow.

nkyin kyin: ALA Conference in Ohio

2011-04-19T21:18:00.000-04:00

Sorry for the lack of updates last week! We were in Ohio for Roger to deliver a paper at the African Literature Association's annual conference. It was a wonderful time, and we got to see some old friends, but it did keep us busy, involving 20 hours of driving as it did. Hopefully next week, I'll be back on my regular schedule. Until then, here's a little recap of our trip:

Thursday, April 14, 2011 - Athens, OH

After a long Wednesday of driving, celebrating Roger's 23rd birthday, and putting the finishing touches on his paper, Thursday came as a big relief. Roger delivered his paper, "Imagining Africa through the Multicultural Museum," first thing in the morning, and it went incredibly well. The paper was a re-worked excerpt of his undergraduate thesis, and he gave it exactly one year and one day after he finished that behemoth, so I think it was a nice way to come full-circle. I won't go into the details of the paper here, mainly because I'll probably not get down each nuance that Roger conveyed, but it went extremely well, and he had no trouble addressing the challenges of one particularly mean audience member. He's still 100% focused on graduate school right now, but I hope that once things are settled with that, he'll be as proud of what he accomplished as I am. He's a pretty smart cookie, that guy.

The view from OU

The rest of the day was spent in and out of panels, including ones on such interesting topics as: Reconfiguring the Global: Bodies, Commodities, and the Marketplace, Crossing Borders, Crossing Genres, New Writings and Explorations, African Poetry and Prose: Readings by Four African Women Writers, Local and Transnational Spaces in African Visual Arts, and a talk on genealogy by Laila Lalami. They were all very interesting, and even the less interesting ones gave me some new ideas, so I'm really glad that we went. It was also nice to be at a professional conference, which was, while very different in tone (and maybe not in a good way) from the conference in Indiana, a good experience for me. Academia is a tough field, and while I'm not really entering it, it's a part of my life in a pretty major way, and it's good to get some first hand experience with it.

Roger at Salaam

Athens was a nice little town, mostly centered around the enormous university that it houses. I'm always amazed by universities that become cities in and of themselves, and this was no exception. The Baker Center, where the conference was held, was simply gorgeous. A big, open building with a variety of amenities (including really good cakes and cookies and things for the conference), it was a really great location for the conference. We didn't explore too much outside of campus, but we did have dinner (for the second night in a row) at Salaam, a recommendation from a friend I met in Indiana. We went to the restaurant with Roger's thesis adviser, who is a poet and teaches Africana Studies, and had a wonderful meal. Their harira is like nothing I've ever tasted (it even smelled beautiful), and I really enjoyed their hummus and coconut curry chicken. After collecting our parking ticket (me? get a parking ticket? shocking.), we rushed off to the last panel of the evening, and headed back to the hotel (where JFK stayed in 1959!) around 10pm. I'm not sure what Thirsty Thursdays are like in Athens, but I do know that I really enjoy getting to bed early lately!

Kroger x 2

Oh, and perhaps most importantly, Roger and I visited our namesake grocery store, Kroger, for the first time right before heading back to the hotel. People seem to think it's pronounced crow-jer, but we know the truth! While there, we bought a supply of gummies (for me) and seltzer (for him) and generally enjoyed ourselves in a grocery store that reminded me a bit of Wegman's in Geneva, with only one small difference. Did you know that in Ohio, grocery stores can buy a special license to sell liquor? Well, they can.

{This Moment}

2011-04-08T09:39:00.000-04:00

A Friday ritual inspired by Amanda Soule & many others.

Please feel free to share a link to your own moment in the comments.

Worlds of Wonder: Tahiti

2011-04-06T22:13:00.000-04:00

http://tinyurl.com/44m8u6o

Guys, it's raining in New York. Yes, I'm glad it isn't snowing any more, and yes, I know I don't like the heat and humidity of the deep summer, either, but I saw some dogwoods blossoming on 34th Street today like it was really and truly spring time, and I want sun. And not just sun. Sun, and sunglasses and sundresses. Beaches and barbecues and boats. I'm ready for spring and summer in a way that one is ready for them after seriously considering buying a Subaru all winter because that's how much snow there was. And my idea of summer fun is pretty different than the average all-inclusive-buyer's idea, but in the spirit of longing for warmth, I present (an extremely abridged version of the wikipedia entry on) Tahiti:

http://tinyurl.com/4y3c67y

Tahiti's average temperature is between 70°F and 88°F, and doesn't change much through the seasons. It is part of French Polynesia, so the national language is French, though some of the population still speaks Tahitian. The main industry is, of course, tourism, and there are a variety of luxury resorts throughout the islands, along with black sand beaches and pearls. Straight south of Hawaii and a twelve-hour plane ride from JFK, I can think of some other beach vacations I'd be more likely to go on, but I can definitely see the appeal.

Gratituesday: Pretzels

2011-04-05T23:01:00.001-04:00

http://www.flickr.com/photos/13101664@N03/4679594989

The first two days of this week have gone by slowly, and it seems like everyone I know is on vacation or about to be, so today really called for some pretzels. I first had these when my parents were breaking in their new KitchenAid mixer, and was shocked that there was no butter in the recipe at all. These pretzels are amazing, tasting just like those really greasy ones from the mall, and so easy to make. I hardly ever cook on weekdays, so for me to put together something that needs to rise was a bit of a miracle, and also a testament to how simple they are. They hardly take any effort at all, especially if you have a stand-up mixer, and the pretzels turn out absolutely perfect every time. Although I can't say if they'll make the rest of my week move any faster, they definitely helped improve my mood this evening, and for this Gratituesday, that's enough.

Soft Pretzels (from AllRecipes)

4 teaspoons active dry yeast
1 teaspoon white sugar
1 1/4 cups warm water (110 degrees F/45 degrees C)
5 cups all-purpose flour
1/2 cup white sugar
1 1/2 teaspoons salt
1 tablespoon vegetable oil

1/2 cup baking soda
4 cups hot water
1/4 cup kosher salt, for topping [I use way, way less, & you can also try cinnamon/sugar!]

In a small bowl, dissolve yeast and 1 teaspoon sugar in warm water. Let stand until creamy, about 10 minutes.
In a large bowl, mix together flour, 1/2 cup sugar, and salt. Make a well in the center; add the oil and yeast mixture. Mix and form into a dough. If the mixture is dry, add one or two tablespoons of water. Knead the dough until smooth, about 7 to 8 minutes. Lightly oil a large bowl, place the dough in the bowl and turn to coat with oil. Cover with plastic wrap and let rise in a warm place until doubled in size, about 1 hour.
Preheat oven to 450 degrees F (230 degrees C). In a large bowl, dissolve baking soda in hot water.
When risen, turn dough out onto a lightly floured surface and divide into 12 equal pieces. Roll each piece into a rope and twist into a pretzel shape. Once all of the dough is all shaped, dip each pretzel into the baking soda solution and place on a greased baking sheet. Sprinkle with kosher salt.
Bake in preheated oven for 8 minutes, until browned.

Collage, Cyborg, Corpse: Conference in Indiana

2011-04-02T12:31:00.001-04:00

Sunday, March 28, 2011 - Bloomington, IN to New York, NY

Despite Carlea promising me all weekend we would go to the IU gym's sauna (oh my, I just love saunas!), we ended up enjoying ourselves too much to make it there, and spent Sunday relaxing and getting ready to fly home. Instead, we had a hearty breakfast at Wee Willie's, which was good and filling, if difficult for most people to find (as in, "No, you've passed it! It's right across from the strip club. Yes, that building that doesn't have a sign and looks closed."). The food, service, and prices reminded me of George's at home, or Water Street in Geneva. We headed back to Michelle's to finish packing, before meeting up with the group at Goodwill. I told you there was a lot of thrifting this weekend. This Goodwill was, compared to the others I've been in, miraculous. It was clean, you could easily peruse the aisles, and they had really nice things, including furniture, for sale. I'd definitely recommend a trip if you're out there. My bag was stuffed full with books and my two new tops, but if it wasn't, I would definitely have bought some things.

We all headed over to the Scholar's Inn Bakeshop afterward (this time at a bigger location) and enjoyed dessert before saying goodbye to Carlea's friends. We boarded the bus and made our way safely to the Indianapolis airport, and shared an uneventful flight to Detroit together, before parting ways for good. Or, until next weekend, when Carlea comes to New York to do a reading. Exciting!

Overall, a really great experience. I loved Bloomington, and am pretty much sold on the idea of living in a college town one day. Speaking at the conference was wonderful and I felt really supported, and seeing everyone else's panels was inspiring and interesting. I'd love to go to more conferences in the future, especially writing or literature related ones.

Collage, Cyborg, Corpse: Conference in Indiana

2011-03-31T22:44:00.003-04:00

Saturday, March 26, 2011 - Bloomington, IN

Carlea & Me, pre-conference

Saturday morning, we woke up early and headed to campus to prepare for our talk, "Collage, Cyborg, Corpse: Metaphors for Collaborative Experience," which we gave at 9am. You can see the talk for yourself over at Call & Response, but I think it went really well. Since I haven't explained yet what we were proposing, I'll give a little detail. After looking over more recent scholarship on collaboration (Levi-Strauss's bricoleur and Haraway's cyborg), we realized that while these were completely interesting and valid metaphors, we had a third, equally valid one: the exquisite corpse.* Looking at modern life's myriad collaborations, surrealism becomes a remarkably relevant lens. People seemed to understand what we were saying (some nods, some note-taking), and the questions they asked at the end were all really intelligent, and made some valid points. The only thing I would change about our presentation is that I would have preferred to have a more conversational presentation, since we mostly read the paper directly, which isn't my favorite presentation strategy. Given how crazy busy we both were in the weeks leading up to it, though, and the fact that I've been out of school for three years and Carlea's been out for one year, I think we did a damn good job, and I'm really proud of us. The paper may not have been total genius, and C&R may never get a million readers (or, let's be honest, a thousand), but we worked really hard on both, and we care a lot about both, and the fact that we're doing them is awesome.

Carlea & Jeremy are hilarious.

The presentations after ours were both really interesting, if only slightly related to our project. Carlea and I joked that we were accidentally put on the panel, which was called "Almost Alive," because we had the word cyborg in our title. I don't doubt that, but the other two papers, Kimberly A. Musial's "The Bionic Skyscraper: Kenneth Yeang's National Library of Singapore" and Joseph A. Tuminello III's "Connections Between Humans & their Avatars: Applying Clark & Chalmer's** 'Extended Mind' Thesis," were both really interesting, and I'm honored that we could all share a panel. We attended a second panel, "Between You ad Me...", which was more of a discussion, right afterward, and I had a chance to meet up with my friend Traci (who, coincidentally, was presenting at the same time as we were, about collaborative poetry) for the first time since I worked with her on the SLC Poetry Festival in 2008. She's amazing, and when I asked, "What have you been up to for three years?", she casually replied, "Well, once I finished my MFA, I drove across the country and lived in my car before marrying my best friend and having my first book published. Since he's finishing his PhD at Western Michigan and I knew I'd be there for at least four more years, I figured I should get mine too, so now I'm teaching and doing that." Wow, right? I know. Wow.

Ahh! Boylan's Soda Fountain!

On the way to Soma.

Carlea and I skipped the free pizza lunch to continue our foray through Bloomington's amazing food scene. After stopping by the Bloomington Public Library booksale (finds: Brenda Hillman, Robert Bly, Michael Fried, Saskia Hamilton, Joshua Weiner, and Zadie Smith) and meeting up with some of Carlea's folklore friends, we all headed over to Bloomingfoods, one of my most favorite grocery stores of all time. It's small, local, with a few branches, each of which is special in its own way. On Saturday afternoon, we headed to the smallest of the three branches, which has an amazing deli. Carlea and I split an enormous turkey, avocado and cheddar sandwich AND a delicious quesadilla with goat cheese and pear relish on a perfectly fried corn tortilla. I'd forgotten how deeply in love with corn tortillas I am. The cherry on top? A Boylan's soda fountain! For $0.99 a glass! Oh my god, I nearly died. This was such a fun, fun meal. I am smiling just thinking about it now.

Carlea, Ozan, and Dave at Turkauz.

After lingering upstairs in the dining area for a while, we decided we had time to head to Material Plane, another vintage shop, before Jeremy needed to be at his presentation. The shop was nice, and a few of us tried different things on, but no one purchased anything. A quick stop for a Lewinsky at Soma (okay, it was around this point that I decided I should eschew all pretension about living in New York and move to Bloomington) and we headed over to the Kelley Business School, where the Folklore conference was being held to see Jeremy's presentation on "Creating Community in New Delhi's Comics Culture." One ice cream sundae at Hartzell's later, and we were back at Michelle's, relaxing and packing until dinner time, which turned out to be quite late. A big group of us met up at Turkauz, a Turkish cafe where we were all able to sit on the floor. Don't ask why I find this so appealing. I just do. I had a wonderful eggplant pide with fried egg, and with the delicious lentil soup and the salads that came before it, a small was the perfect size. I'm not sure why, but about halfway through the pide, it started to feel like one of the best meals I'd had in a long time. All of the food was incredible this trip, but there was something just perfect about the fried bread. And at $10 for the whole meal, I don't think I need to explain how into Bloomington I was by the end of Saturday. I was totally in.

*I link to wikipedia here because wikipedia is part of our argument, and also because it's usually really good at making difficult concepts easier to understand. If you'd like to see some of the sources we used, though, shoot me a comment and I'll send you copies.
** Um, these two are my authors! Did I tell you I have the greatest job ever?